Royal Rumble '02

Legacy Review

Royal Rumble '02

January 20, 2002 from the Philips Arena in Atlanta, GA

 

Commentary: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

 

2001 was a hugely important year in WWF history. It saw the purchase of both WCW and ECW, the unofficial end of the Attitude Era at Wrestlemania 17 to culminate one of the greatest Rumble to WM seasons ever, the lackluster Invasion angle which completely buried the WCW name once and for all, and in December the crowning of the first ever Undisputed Champion. As the calendar turns, it would turn out that 2002 would be no less consequential, the first year of what would later become known as the Ruthless Aggression era.

 

There's two major stories heading into this year's Rumble. First, the return of Triple H to a massive hero's welcome back at the first Raw of the year at MSG, coming back from the devastating quad tear that almost ended his career the previous spring. I'm not sure if it was the original plan or not, but the reception he got meant he would be a face for really the first time in his career as his comeback got underway, and he was the overwhelming favorite to win the Rumble. Second, the continuing post-Invasion saga of Vince McMahon and Ric Flair being 50/50 co-owners of WWF. Their inability to get along or work together has escalated to the point where they're going to settle it the way you're supposed to in wrestling, in the ring, tonight.

 

The opening video is really cool, showcasing great and famous Rumble moments of the past in a museum like setting. And also that year Vince won it. Don't ask, it was Russo.

 

WWF Tag Team Championship: Spike Dudley & Tazz (c) def The Dudley Boyz (w/Stacy Keibler) in 5:06- Spike's ongoing war with his half/half and half/quarter/tenth/whatever it is brothers continues. He recently partnered up with the Dudleyz' former ECW and Alliance stablemate Tazz and with him finally wrested the tag titles away on Raw a couple of weeks prior. Incidentally, that's also the only non-Hardcore title Tazz won his entire WWF run. Spike's coming in with a neck brace on after taking a 3D in a parking lot on weekly TV. As usual with the Dudleyz it's a jump start as soon as everyone's in the ring. Bubba Ray is taking a page out of Jeff Hardy's recent playbook, wearing a cap and leaving it on for the first part of the match. The difference is Bubba Ray is wearing it backwards. The Dudleyz back suplex Tazz on the floor, and that also knocks the cap off. Spike gets isolated in the ring and also takes a double team back suplex. Bubba Ray targets Spike's hurt neck, hitting a neckbreaker, then taking Spike's neck brace off and hitting another. Suplex from Bubba Ray. D'Von tags in and keeps the focus on the neck. He hits a leaping neck snap, a nice shoutout to Mr. Perfect, who it had already been announced would be making his WWF return in the Rumble tonight. Bubba Ray continues hitting suplexes or possibly brain busters. Spike manages to slip out of one and hits the Dudley Dog! Both guys crawl for tags. Ref Jack Doan has a brain fart, first holding back D'Von, then he realizes, turns around and keeps Tazz from coming in after not seeing the tag. The Dudleyz hit Spike with a double flapjack. Spike avoids a D'Von headbutt off the top rope, then dodges and gets the Dudleyz to double clothesline each other. Tag to Tazz. Clotheslines and suplex tosses for everyone. Northern lights suplex on D'Von that Bubba Ray breaks up before 3. Spike hits a crossbody off the top rope on Bubba Ray. Tazz hits a kick to Bubba Ray's head that Bubba Ray does a crazy sell of. Another Dudley Dog on Bubba Ray. Stacy gets on the apron. Tazz ducks a slap from her and puts her in the Tazzmission! D'Von quickly saves her. Spike goes for another Dudley Dog but D'Von tosses him out to the floor. Tazzmission on D'Von! He quickly taps out! Fine for the time it got. After dominating the tag division most of the last year the Dudleyz were being slowly phased out, and would be one of the teams broken up in the first brand split draft after Wrestlemania. *3/4

 

WWF Intercontinental Championship: William Regal def Edge (c) in 9:45- Despite losing to Edge at Vengeance Regal's continued going after the title using the "power of the punch", as in brass knucks, so Edge has countered with a good old steel chair. Recently on Smackdown a one man conchairto broke Regal's nose, which commentary said required "multiple surgeries" to get Regal looking normal again. Ref Nick Patrick searches around the whole ring for knucks during entrances, then does an extensive check of Regal before the match. Even going so far as to put his hand down Regal's tights! Just another night in Blackpool for Regal I guess. And Patrick does find the knucks! While Regal's reeling from that Edge attacks. He hits a backdrop and stomps Regal down in the corner, then faceplants Regal right on his formerly broken nose. Regal responds with a quick running knee to Edge's head. Edge dodges a European uppercut and wraps up a backslide. Regal quickly escapes that and hits a forearm. Edge hits a ripcord enzuguri. Nice, that was a bit different. Regal does a sloppy German suplex that Edge does a full 180 on, then covers for 2. More knees for another 2. Regal hooks up a double underhook. Edge backdrops to try to get free, but Regal hangs on and maneuvers around to hit the powerbomb for 2. Another nice sequence. Running forearm from Regal. Another running knee sends Edge to the floor. Regal puts on a double underhook on the apron. Edge gets free and DDTs Regal on the apron! Hardest Part of the Ring TM. He drags Regal in and gets a 2 count with Regal getting a foot on the rope, but most of Edge's body was also under the ropes and Patrick admits he never should have counted anyway. They collide hard near the corner and both guys are down. Forearm exchange as they get back up. Edge hits a leg lariat and suplex for 2. Another Regal German. Edge clothesline for 2. Edge goes for the Edgecution. Regal counters and grinds Edge down into the Regal Stretch! Edge crawls and gets a rope break. He tries to counter into his own Stretch but can't do it as good and Regal gets an easy rope break. Edge dropkicks Regal in the back and rolls him up for 2. After a top rope fight Regal gets dropped down and Edge hits a spinning heel kick off the top rope. While Regal's down he gets his backup knucks out. After how extensive a search Patrick did I don't want to know where those were hidden. Edge goes for the spear, but Regal uses Patrick as a shield! While Patrick's down Regal hits the power of the knucks punch! Edge is out. Regal crawls over, covers, and gets the pin to take the IC title! After he leaves Edge is still out and every ref in the building comes in to check on him. Perfectly solid. **1/2

 

WWF Women's Championship: Trish Stratus (c) def Jazz in 3:43- History mostly remembers Trish and Lita and that's fair enough, but to me this more than any other was the feud that really solidified this era of the women's division as the best in the ring until the start of the modern women's era. Jacqueline is the guest ref for this for really no particular reason. Trish is coming in with a hurt hand after Jazz smashed it in the lid of an equipment trunk. Jazz jumps her as soon as she gets in the ring. Backdrop and big splash for 2. Trish forearms back and hits a sunset flip that leads to a run of cradle counters. Clothesline from Jazz and she hits a hot shot. Legdrop for 2. She finally starts working on Trish's hurt hand, though she seems to be going for the arm more than the hand. After cranking Trish's arm on the bottom rope Jazz takes issue with Jacqueline's count and they shove each other. Trish comes from behind and rolls Jazz up. Jazz counters into her own cradle. Jacqueline hesitates, then counts 2. Jawbreaker from Trish. Jazz goes after the hand/arm again. Trish counters into a springboard Stratusfaction! Jazz kicks out! DDT from Jazz for 2. Corner clolthesline. Trish gets a boot up in the corner. Another Stratusfaction! That gets a pin to retain! Bit of a sudden ending there but decent enough match. **

 

Street Fight: "Nature Boy" Ric Flair def Mr. McMahon in 14:55- I think it goes without saying that this is Flair's first match back with the WWF. Strangely, there's no stipulations or nothing on the line in this match. Both guys will still be 50/50 WWF owners no matter who wins. Flair's oldest and youngest kids, daughter Megan and son Reid, are ringside. Midring staredown before the bell. This was a match no one could have imagined during Flair's first WWF run because Vince was still years away from actually working matches. Lockup! Vince wins that and Flair goes a little nuts with his first bump. Vince cranks a headlock, hits a shoulderblock and poses. He mocks Flair's strut. Another lockup and Flair does his hammerlock workaround into a leg takedown. He pounds Vince down in the corner, then struts around himself looking very happy. He's been on record how bad late era WCW was for him and how much of a relief it was to be back with a properly run company. Vince hits a chop in the corner, a halfway decent one. Flair turns him around and shows him how to do chops right. Vince eye rakes and hits a clothesline. Flair comes out of the corner, milks the moment.....Flair Flop! There's definitely a bit of a pop for that. Corner whip and Flair Flip, but he can't get all the way over and lands in the ring. Ring rust. Vince knocks him down to the floor. Flair takes a shot with the famous "Keep Off" aisleway sign. Vince runs Flair into the barricade, then gets a trash can from under the ring and gives Flair a shot with that. Flair, as you knew he would, is busted open. Vince works the cut and runs Flair into the post and stairs. He gets Flair in front of his kids, takes Megan's camera, points the camera at him and Flair and takes the 2002 equivalent of a selfie, then tosses the camera back. Nice catch from Megan on that. Back in Vince stays in control and starts working on Flair's leg. Apron and post shots on the knee. Vince hooks on a figure four! After a couple of near falls Flair fights and reverses it! Vince releases and goes to the floor limping. He goes under the timekeeper's table and gets the lead pipe he's been using this whole feud. Flair cuts off a pipe shot with a low blow! More chops from Flair on the floor. He grabs a monitor from the Spanish announce table and nails Vince with it! Funny bit after where Flair looks in the monitor wanting to see himself, then the camera gets the other monitor in frame where we do see the replay. Now Vince is bleeding. Flair takes him over to his kids, bites Vince's cut and poses for pictures. Back in Vince begs off. Flair attacks the cut again and gets another sneaky style low blow. Then he picks the pipe up and nails Vince with it! The figure four is on! Vince taps out WITH BOTH HANDS! It's got a bit of the usual McMahon smoke and mirrors, but by and large Vince lets Flair lead a very Flair style match. It shows that Vince could be unselfish with people that he trusted. This would be the kickoff of Flair's new beginning in WWF, slowly getting his confidence back and having the proper final act of his THE greatest of all time career over the next 6 years. ***

 

In the back, Steph rescues Nick Patrick from having to explain what happened in the IC title match. Steph then cuts a promo supporting her returning husband Triple H, saying he's taking out everyone in the Rumble, listing them off then going into great detail about how hard Austin is going down. Unknown to her, Austin heard from his locker room and has snuck up behind her. When Steph realizes Austin "WHAT"s her until she runs off screaming! Freaking hilarious. Austin then conducts the crowd in a WHAT concerto. We're in the period that chant has absolutely taken over. More on that in a bit. 

 

Undisputed WWF Championship: Chris Jericho (c) def The Rock in 18:48- Running this back one more time before everyone moves on for Wrestlemania season. The difference in this match is it's the first one after Jericho's clear heel turn after winning the title at Vengeance. MASSIVE pop for the Rock. As I said before, at this point I think he's the undisputed #1 star in the company, surpassing Austin. Another prematch staredown with Jericho talking and Rock listening. Jericho puts his hand in Rock's face! Rock responds by putting his fist in Jericho's face. Unbelievably quick back elbow from Rock, then a Samaon drop for 2. That was video game turbo speed. Jericho bails to the floor. Rock goes out and chases him. Spear from Rock back in the ring! Jericho fights back with a flying forearm. Corner clothesline. Rock dodges and Jericho goes shoulder first into the post. Faceplant from Rock. Jericho gets a hot shot and chops Rock in the corner. Rock hits a back elbow but runs into a leg lariat for 2. Suplex from Jericho. Arrogant cover! Jericho goes over and takes a top turnbuckle pad off. Rock fights off a Walls attempt. Jericho kicks him back down and lays in some ground and pound. Missile dropkick for 2. Jericho works a chinlock and we get arm drops. Rock fights back up but runs into a back elbow. He manages to crotch Jericho on the top rope, hits some chops and superplexes Jericho. Snap belly to belly from Rock for 2. Jericho hits the misdirection bulldog. Lionsault! No cover. He goes for a second one and it hits! Rock kicks out! Full on temper tantrum from Jericho and he gets in a shoving match with Hebner. He tries coming off the second rope, but Rock catches him and hooks on the World's Shittiest Sharpshooter! Jericho's fellow Canadians Lance Storm and Christian run out. Storm distracts Hebner while Jericho clearly taps out. Rock fights Christian off in the ring. Jericho hits Rock with a Rock Bottom! Rock kicks out again! Senton from Jericho. He realizes where he and Rock are. Elbow pad off and Jericho goes for a People's Elbow. Rock kips up and momentum tosses Jericho over the top to the floor! Both announce tables get cleared off. Jericho pulls Rock up on the Spanish table for a Rock Bottom. Rock fights it off, and Rock Bottoms Jericho off the Spanish table through the English table! He drags Jericho back in and covers for a long 2. Rock coils behind Jericho looking to finish it. Jericho fights a Rock Bottom off. He fights Rock over into the Walls! Rock crawls and gets a rope break. Jericho tries the Walls again but Rock small packages him for 2. Speed run, Jericho ducks and Rock wipes out Hebner. Jericho gives Rock a shot with one of the belts. Nick Patrick runs in and counts. Rock kicks out! Jericho is beside himself. DDT from Rock. He covers but Patrick straight up refuses to count. Guess he's lapsed back into full evil after tiptoeing around it the whole Invasion. Rock Bottom on Patrick! Spinebuster on Jericho. The People's Elbow hits! Rock covers but Hebner's still out. Low blow from Jericho. He runs Rock into the exposed turnbuckle! There's a nice long payoff. That's still not enough, as Jericho stacks Rock up in the corner and puts his feet on the ropes for extra leverage. Hebner counts and Jericho gets the pin to retain! Like Kurt Angle the year before, the improbable weasel heel title reign continues. One last dose of Rock/Jericho goodness as they'd built up great chemistry over the past months, and the overbooking doesn't hurt too much now Jericho's a clear heel again. ****1/4

 

Back to the WHAT takeover. On the go home Raw Austin gave what just might be my favorite promo of all time, so I'm putting it here as a lead in to the Rumble. Austin goes over his pre-Rumble training, Rumble strategy, has words for Triple H throughout, and tops it off with an ode to the greatest fast food restaurant in the world. It's so good he breaks Cole multiple times.

 

 

Royal Rumble- I could listen to Howard Finkel run down the Rumble rules all day. They should seriously get old footage of him doing it every year.

1 & 2. Rikishi and Goldust- The Curse of Ted DiBiase hits Rikishi, drawing #1 after being #30 last year. Goldust is one of several wrestlers, or characters, making their already announced WWF return in this Rumble. Nowadays they'd all be unannounced surprises but that wasn't quite as much of a thing back then. I love JR's "Rikishi's weight is from Parts Unknown" line. After the bell Goldust circles Rikishi while the gold flakes continue to fall. Rikishi attacks and we're off. Goldust makes the error of trying a sunset flip and gets the hell out of town. Rikishi gets Goldust over the top a couple of times but he manages to land on the apron both times. There's a special countdown clock this year, doing away with the traditional clock graphic.

3. The Big Boss Man- For some reason Goldust decides to climb the top rope. Rikishi crotches him, then squashes Boss Man in the same corner. Boss Man gets Rikishi down in the corner and he and Goldust agree to team up to try to get the large ass out. They can't.

4. Bradshaw- You'd think Bradshaw would do better in Rumbles, he's a barroom brawl guy. Rikishi gets Boss Man down in the drop zone and it's stinkface time. Superkick and Rikishi eliminates Boss Man. JR: "He can take a shower and disinfect his face". Rikishi Samoan drop on Bradshaw.

5. Lance Storm- He and Goldust have a spunky back and forth, but completely whiff a hot shot that Storm sells anyway. Other than that bit of a slow start this year.

6. Al Snow- Bradshaw Clothesline from Hell on Storm! Good Texan on Canadian violence. Snow makes the seemingly mandatory attempt to lift Rikishi over the top rope in the corner. Goldust's gold flakes are still all over the ring.

7. Billy- No longer Billy Gunn or The One or Mr. Ass or anything else. It's just Billy, of Billy & Chuck, the soon to be new dominant tag team in the company. Billy goes speed but runs into a Bradshaw big boot. Snow and Storm both go over the top onto the apron and slug it out there. Back kick from Snow and Storm falls down eliminated. While Bradshaw's trying to get rid of Goldust Billy sneaks from behind and eliminates Bradshaw.

8. WWF Hardcore Champion The Undertaker- Now we're kicking things up a notch. Taker rides out on his bike, Rumble or no. Chokeslam on Billy. Shots from Taker on everyone else. He chokeslams Goldust over the top right to the floor. Taker tosses Snow out. Clothesline and Rikishi's gone. Taker tosses Billy out! Ring completely cleared.

9. Matt Hardy- Good symmetry here as both Hardyz had been feuding with Taker over the Hardcore title. Matt comes in firing, but runs into a goozle. Lita tries coming off the top rope and lands in a goozle! Low blow from Lita on Taker! Swinging neckbreaker from Matt and they both lay in stomps on Taker. Get the illegal woman out refs. Finally she does leave. Taker seems almost amused by Matt's attempts to get him over the top rope and easily turns the tables.

10. Jeff Hardy- Without even looking at the rundown I called this would be Jeff. During the countdown Taker tried to suplex Matt over the top rope. Jeff charges in and trips Taker down while he has Matt lifted up. The Hardyz stomp away on Taker. Lita loses her cool and joins them until the ref drags her out. The Hardyz hug to make sure everyone knows they're good again after their little feud at the end of last year. Taker has enough and double clotheslines them. Jeff is tossed over the top onto the apron. Taker lifts Matt up but Jeff breaks it up. Matt Twist of Fate on Taker! Jeff hits the Swanton Bomb! They go for Poetry in Motion. Taker catches Jeff and dumps him over the top and out! Fantastic. Matt gets planted with the Last Ride and Taker tosses him out. Taker's the last man standing again as we hit the next countdown. That whole Taker/Hardyz sequence was really good.

11. Maven- The first Tough Enough winner trying to get going for real. Come into Taker's yard, kid. He charges in....and runs right into a big boot. Taker lifts Maven up to dump him, but Lita's still there and gets on the apron. Taker drops Maven in the ring and shoves her off. The Hardyz attack Taker again! Seems like sore losers to me. Taker fights them off again. MAVEN DROPKICKS TAKER IN THE BACK AND ELIMINATES HIM! HOLY SHIT! One of the absolute most shocking Rumble eliminations there's ever been. MASSIVE POP from the crowd for that. Everyone is stunned, no one moreso than Taker. He slowly gets back in the ring, stalks Maven, pounds him down and tosses him through the ropes to the floor. Taker absolutely murders Maven with a chairshot to the head, pushes a cameraman down, and goes back in for more damage. The ref gaggle finally gets the courage, and numbers, to try to get him away. While that's happening the countown hits.

12. Scotty2Hotty- Taker dumps Maven back in the ring and sees Scotty. I don't like his chances. Taker knocks Scotty out in the aisle with one punch! Then he goes back in the ring, tosses bleeding Maven over the top and out, which does count as an elimination even though Taker's out, then dumps him over the barricade and pounds him up into the medium priced seats. They're going all the way into the concession area as the countdown hits again.

13. WWF European Champion Christian- The camera is still following in the back and Taker tosses Maven into a popcorn machine. I think they've made their point, let's get on with the rest of the match. Taker grabs a mouthful of popcorn and I think he's done. Meanwhile, Christian is standing in the ring by himself and loving it. Scotty is still in it but is laid out in the aisle. Finally Scotty drags himself back in and we're on again. Christian dodges a Worm setup and hits a reverse DDT.

14. Diamond Dallas Page- Entering his only career Rumble. He takes it to Christian while Scotty recovers. Diamond Cutter on Christian! Man, how much has DDP's bad WWF run killed him, that got almost no reaction. Scotty superkicks DDP through the ropes to the floor, then sees Christian in position. Cheap pop move time. The W O R M hits, then DDP comes from behind and dumps Scotty out!

15. Chuck- The former Chuck Palumbo, the other half of the platonic partners Billy & Chuck. DDP fights him off and hits a swinging neckbreaker. Chuck comes back with a jawbreaker. After some back and forth Christian helps Chuck out with DDP.

16. The Godfather- Another returnee in this year's Rumble. Rumble or no, he's got the Ho Train with him. A train with TWO cars. It is his big return. Hold up. THREE cars. Every escort service in Atlanta is making money tonight. I'm not joking here, I wish I was, DDP gets eliminated off camera while TV is completely focused on Godfather dancing with his hos. What a perfect summation of DDP's WWF run. I'm also not joking when I say when Godfather finally get in the ring the countdown starts up for the next entrant.

17. Albert- Too Cool's music played for Albert so I guess this is when he's with them still. He gives Godfather a bicycle kick and goes to eliminate him. Chuck and Christian instead come from behind and eliminate Albert. Godfather gets both of them in the corner and loads up the train. Both guys dodge, double clothesline and Godfather is eliminated.

18. Perry Saturn- Are Saturn's trunks....cow print? He always was a little strange. But to be a Ranger, God bless them and all our troops, you've got to have a screw loose. All three guys back and forth brawl while the crowd gets distracted by something else going on.

19. "Stone Cold" Steve Austin- Shit's getting serious now. Kind of an early number for Austin too. Vest off, in ring, whoop ass can open. Christian is out. Stunner on Saturn. Chuck is out. And Saturn is out. Another complete ring clear. As is tradition, Austin checks his wrist tape watch. He decides there's too much time left and he might get bored so he drags Christian back in, gives him a Stunner, and tosses him out again! That should count as an elimination for next year's Rumble. Chuck then gets pulled in to take a Stunner and get double tossed. Austin, like in '97, sits on the top rope and checks his "watch".

20. Val Venus- Another of the returnees. I don't like his chances to last. And not just because he's gotten older. Austin's all over him as soon as he's in. WHAT stomps in the corner. Venus eye pokes and gets some shots in. He's actually able to string some moves together. Austin's trying to kill the whole period. Thesz press during the countdown.

21. Test- Venus did last. Color me shocked. Test and Venus team up to keep Austin down. Austin slugs back and Test big boots Venus while aiming for Austin. Clothesline and Venus is gone. Stunner on Test and out he goes. Austin lays down in the ring and makes sure his watch is still working.

22. Triple H- Here we go. The two favorites and the two guys clearly positioned to fight this Rumble out. Being HHH's first match back from injury he very much takes his time on his entrance, milking it for all its worth. HHH finally gets in and they stare down. I know it's been more than 90 seconds or 2 minutes. Slugfest!

23. The Hurricane- Fantastic placement for this entry. Austin and HHH double clothesline each other. Hurricane runs in and wants a chokeslam. Goozle on HHH. Goozle on Austin. Austin and HHH look at each other, say "Can you believe this shit", and team up to toss Hurricane out! Fantastic. Then they go right back to slugging it out with each other. Big chop exchange in the corner. Austin hits a spinebuster, but HHH's knee catches him in the head.

24. Faarooq- He'll put up a bit more of a fight. Big spinebuster on Austin. HHH saves Austin. Stunner on Faarooq. Then HHH follows up with a clothesline and Faarooq is gone! Austin and HHH take turns trying to eliminate each other.

25. Mr. Perfect- Big nostalgia pop for Curt Hennig's return. He spent the second half of the '90s in WCW mostly looking like a physical shell of his former awesome self. Greatest Intercontinental champion of all time before Gunther in my opinion. He takes a minute to survey the situation then charges right into the middle of it. Again Austin and HHH team up to try to get rid of the guy getting in the way of them fighting each other.

26. Kurt Angle- With Taker gone Angle is the only real plausible chance for a non-HHH or Austin upset winner. He goes right after HHH while Austin and Perfect go at it and the crowd chants "You suck! WHAT?". I heard HHH say "Go" right before Angle suplexes him. Oh yeah, HHH is back. Austin again saves HHH and takes an Angle belly to belly suplex for his trouble.

27. The Big Show- Perfect quickly takes a chokeslam. Double goozle on HHH and Austin. They fight free and pound on Show. Show responds with clotheslines. Angle tries to German suplex Show! Not happening. Show presses Angle up but HHH kicks Show's knee before he can do anything. Chokeslam on HHH.

28. Kane- Show and Kane both in late, two guys that will never win but can both make a lot of noise. Kane had just set the record for most eliminations in a single Rumble the year before. He and Show slug it out while everyone else rests. Very modern setup, one that I don't care for. There should always be things happening all over the ring, even if it's at half effort to save energy as long as the focus isn't on them. Double goozle! Neither guys will give an inch. Finally Kane low blows Show. He lifts Show up and dumps him over the top to eliminate him! Phenomenal strength. Austin Stunner on Kane. Angle gets Kane up for an Angle Slam and dumps him out to eliminate him! Guess neither of those guys will make too much noise this year. The four guys still in go back to their previous pair offs.

29. Rob Van Dam- Nice pop for the only member of the Alliance that got anywhere with the WWF crowd during the Invasion. He goes right to the top rope. FIVE STAR FROG SPLASH on Angle! He fights off the other three guys with the educated feet. Rolling thunder on Austin. HHH Pedigree on RVD! But he can't follow up and everyone is down. The way HHH collapsed after that it was almost like he blew his quad out again. I suspect he's not fully back in ring shape yet. The other guys slowly get back to slugging it out again while RVD lays dead in the middle of ring. Perfect blocks an Angle suplex attempt and hits his own, sadly not a Perfectplex. Imagine how insanely great a peak Perfect/Angle match could have been.

30. Booker T- Unlike RVD, he was mostly buried during the Invasion, leading to the crowd to not give a damn about him at all. It'd get better eventually. As soon as he gets in he dumps RVD out! That'll get the crowd to turn against you hard. Booker then looks around and sees everyone's down so decides to give us a Spinaroonie. Austin Stunner! The ricochet sends Booker all the way out to the floor!

FINAL FOUR: Austin, HHH, Perfect, Angle- Angle tries to Angle Slam Austin but Austin slips free. Angle then fights off a Stunner. That sends Austin into HHH's waiting Pedigree arms. Austin fights that off and slingshots HHH into the corner, with HHH going crazy over the top with it. Angle Slam on HHH! While all this is going on Perfect is kneeling in the corner literally sucking wind. Sorry to say, he's just not up to it anymore as WWF would soon find out. He finally gets up and tries to swing some shots at Austin. Angle ROLLING GERMANS on Austin! Austin low blows out after three. Austin gets Perfect up on the ropes. Angle comes up and he and Perfect get Austin over the top but not out. Again Austin tries to get Perfect out. Angle comes from behind and eliminates Austin! That's narrowed the field. Austin drags Perfect out and the three of them slug it out on the floor. Damn those Goldust gold discs are still freaking everywhere. Angle and HHH go at it again in the ring, with Perfect slowly joining in. Austin comes in with a chair and waffles Angle and Perfect! And HHH for good measure! Damage done, Austin leaves. Everyone staggers back up. Perfect holds HHH for Angle. Angle charges. HHH ducks and Angle clotheslines Perfect. I'm pretty sure Perfect was supposed to be eliminated there but he couldn't get himself over the top rope and he falls back in the ring. He then attacks Angle. PERFECTPLEX ON ANGLE! Then he does the neck snap. OK, I might have been wrong about that earlier moment, but it was still ugly. HHH clotheslines Perfect out! It's down to two. Hey, remember when these two were in that soap opera love triangle with Steph a couple of years ago? Random thoughts. Angle puts the straps down and they charge in! HHH gets early control, but runs into a belly to belly. Angle tries to dump HHH out. He goes over but lands on the apron. HHH punches Angle back and gets back in. Clothesline and HHH chokes Angle. Angle backdrops HHH over the top! HHH grabs the top rope and just BARELY holds on to keep himself from being eliminated! Angle thinks he's won and celebrates. He turns around and sees HHH. Facebuster! Clothesline and HHH eliminates Angle to win the Rumble! The big comeback is fully on. HHH is going to Wrestlemania.

 

Solidly good Rumble. Not quite as good as the previous years' excellent one, but better than the other Attitude Era Rumbles (anything's better than the '99 Rumble). It started a bit slow, but got rolling good with the Taker/Hardyz stuff and mostly held the momentum from there. The way they did HHH and Austin flipping between beating on each other and teaming up on people keeping them from beating on each other was really well done. An interesting statistical note here: there was no real ironman this year (Austin was #1 in time at a bit under 27 minutes), but overall at just under 70 minutes this was the longest Rumble to date. ***1/2

 

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- Not much happening on the undercard here, but the top matches all delivered to one extent or another and a good Rumble match will always make it at least a decent overall Rumble show. HHH's return was a great shot in the arm to help recover from the Invasion not going as well as hoped, even if it meant Jericho getting an even worse first title run than Angle had the previous year. But the road to Wrestlemania will not be a straightforward one this year, as we'll see in February when another massive return turns the entire company upside down once again.

OVERALL SHOW GRADE: B 

Starrcade '99

Legacy Review

Starrcade '99

December 19, 1999 from the MCI Center in Washington, DC

 

Commentary: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan and Scott Hudson

 

We've got 13 matches on the card and still only 2:45ish to get it all in so lets get right to it. Crash TV waits for no man. I will point out that Scott Hudson is making his PPV debut in commentary tonight essentially as a second play by play man, which Tony looks absolutely thrilled with during the course of the show.

 

The Mamalukes (w/Tony Marinara) def Disco Inferno and Lash LeRoux in 9:00- The story here, as I understand it, is Disco borrowed $25K from the mob, couldn't pay them back, and now boss Marinara is sending his goons to collect or it's concrete galoshes time or something. Doesn't seem like the kind of thing that would normally be settled in a sanctioned wrestling match but whatever. Said goons, Big Vito and Johnny the Bull, would appear later along with Marinara in WWE as a slightly more subtle version of stereotypical Italians, the Full Blooded Italians. I said slightly. Everyone shoves in the ring and it's a good old Russo jump start. Disco manages to fly out of the ring and leave LeRoux to get pummeled. I have no idea why LeRoux is helping Disco here in the first place. I know it's not Disco's personality. Rookie hazing maybe. Vito spitting on LeRoux sets him off for a second before Vito puts him down again. LeRoux strings some moves together on Bull and Disco tags in. Inverted atomic drop and clothesline from Disco for 2. Russian leg sweep for 2. After some dodges Bull sweep kicks Disco to put him down. Commentary is spending all their time talking about Italian food that's been used as weapons or humiliation tools during the course of the feud. Really high brow stuff happening here. Disco goes in peril as the Mamalukes quick tag and double team him. They do such a great job keeping the ref distracted Marinara has to tell the ref to turn around and count at one point. Big double slam on Disco. Vito takes absolutely forever before trying a splash off the top rope, guaranteeing Disco will dodge. He does and tags out to LeRoux. Hot tag run and we're going full DONNYBROOK. Disco and LeRoux outmaneuver the Mamalukes. Disco and Vito fight on the floor (off camera) while LeRoux and Bull have a very sloppy exchange in the ring. Gorilla press from Bull. He hops to the top rope, just barely manages to keep his footing, and comes off with a legdrop that LeRoux dodges. LeRoux hits a neckbreaker to set Bull up. Disco hits a splash off the top rope. Vito breaks the pin up with an elbow off the top rope to the back of Disco's head, then rolls Bull on top of Disco. Ref saw all of that by the way. He counts anyway. LeRoux dives in to break that pin up. Vito gets free from a Chartbuster attempt, then pushes LeRoux to Disco's back. Disco unknowingly gives LeRoux the Chartbuster! Vito plants LeRoux with a DDT and gets the pin. See, that's what you get for trying to help Disco. They kept the pace up so it could have been worse. **

 

After the bell the Italians take Disco out, put him in a body bag and carry him away. Yes, an actual body bag. We follow them through the curtain to the back. They take Disco out of the bag (that was pointless) and stick him in the trunk of a car. Off to the river I presume. They'll be fishing Disco out of the Potomac tomorrow morning.

 

Chris Benoit's music hits and he makes his way to the ring in street clothes. He was scheduled to challenge Scott Hall for the US title tonight in a ladder match. However, Hall suffered a knee injury not long before this show. Or a "knee injury" to cover another rehab trip, either way. If it was a legit injury it'd be Hall's second one just this year. As a result, Benoit was awarded the US title and is coming into tonight as the champion. Benoit's not happy about being given a title, he wants to earn it and challenges anyone in the back to have that ladder match with him tonight. 

 

WCW Cruiserweight Championship: Madusa def Evan Karagias (c) (w/Spice) in 3:35- Intergender wrestling, another one for your Russo bingo card. Medusa was in a (story) relationship with Karagias before she realized the insane age difference and broke up with him to turn heel. I really think they're trying to pretend Madusa is half her actual age, which is hilarious. Spice is Karagias' new girlfriend, much more in his age category and honestly not bad looking at all. I had no memory of her whatsoever. Medusa hits a crossbody onto Karagias from the apron during his entrance and we're off. Crazy scorned woman ground and pound from Madusa. Karagias tries to throw her into the stairs but she either dodges or just didn't want to do it, then gives Karagias a stair shot. Reset in the ring. Madusa dares Karagias to hit her but he won't do it. Slap from Madusa. Punch from Karagias! Corner clothesline. Karagias hits a powerslam. He goes for a springboard moonsault but misses by a mile. Back kick from Madusa. Shotgun dropkick off the second rope. I just realized Madusa is wrestling barefoot. Karagias slams her off the second rope. Powerbomb from Karagias. Jackknife cover, then they fumble around forever before somehow actually pulling off the bridge up spot. Madusa just barely gets Karagias up and around for a powerbomb. Karagias snaps Madusa's throat over the top rope. Dive onto Madusa on the floor. Spice gets on the apron and decides she wants to get freaky in the middle of the match. Everyone should see what's coming. Madusa hits Karagias from behind. Spice is supposed to low blow him for the shocking Russo SWERVE, but she barely gestures in the direction of Karagias' nutsack. He sells it anyway. Madusa hits a German suplex and gets the pin to win, I kid you not, the Cruiserweight title. Remember when this title mattered and was often the show stealer on PPVs? Now it's part of a Russo carnie act. DUD 

 

WCW Hardcore Championship: "Screamin'" Norman Smiley (c) def Meng in 5:00- Unlikely hardcore ace Smiley comes out in full football gear, wearing a Champ Bailey jersey from the hometown Redskins (made by Puma, the good old days when not every NFL jersey was Nike shit). Even though he's in an official Redskins jersey his helmet is generic white. Kind of weird. He's got the usual cart of goodies with him, including a Surge container. Ah, Surge. That oh so '90s attempt to compete with how huge Mountain Dew had become. Meng rolls the cart and knocks Smiley down with it! Trash can shots for Smiley. They quickly go behind the curtain to the back. No time to waste tonight. Smiley gives Meng a chairshot and runs him through some standing girders. Trash can shot for Meng. No effect. Meng hits chops and a headbutt because that's as HARDCORE as any weapon. Smiley's, as his name says, screaming. They fight through what looks like might be the real catering area. Guess no one will need it anymore tonight. Meng slams Smiley onto a table that sort of breaks. Smiley dodges a tossed cinder block and sets off a fire extinguisher in Meng's general direction. Smiley sees Meng still stalking him and dives himself through the curtain separating off catering! Fit Finlay and Brian Knobbs come in and attack Meng. Knobbs goes through the stack of boxes that was begging to be bowling pins for someone. Meng shrugs off can and chair shots. Knobbs gets taken down with a Starrcade sign. Finlay finally hits Meng with a large pipe that finally puts Meng down and they leave, damage done. No 24/7 anyone can win the title rule in WCW. Smiley cautiously makes sure Meng is out, barely puts a finger over to cover him, gets the pin and gets the hell out of town. Meng then comes to and puts the Tongan Death Grip on Nick Patrick, fantastically sold. Smiley's antics bring a certain base level of entertainment value into these matches if nothing else. 1/2*

 

In the back, psycho David Flair is delivered a golden crowbar. I have no further comment. Elsewhere, the Misfits grab Oklahoma and drag him off. More on that later.

 

For the next match, Jim Duggan will have three mystery partners in an eight man tag match against the Revolution. Why is Duggan feuding with them? Because the Revolution declared themselves a "sovereign nation" (not how that works) and all-American Duggan wants nothing to do with that. In addition to that, Russo in his onscreen Powers That Be leader Dr. Claw persona has made Duggan, I'm not kidding, the company's janitor. He's wearing a full zip up jumpsuit and everything. So, the stipulations for this match. If the Revolution win, Duggan has to publicly denounce the US. If Duggan wins, the Revolution has to take over his janitorial duties. I mean, there's four of them so it would certainly be easier for them. After his entrance Duggan introduces his partners, the original Varsity Club! Mike Rotunda, Rick Steiner and Kevin Sullivan. Despite everything I really appreciate the old school throwback here. The Varsity Club was one of the top heel stables in the company at the end of the '80s, right in the same period where Turner bought out Jim Crockett. Rick turning face to leave the Club and feud with Rotunda over the TV title was one of the hottest feuds in the company when it took place and put Rick on the map just before Scott was fully trained and ready to go as a full time team. Rick's even got his Michigan jacket back out for this. "Dr. Death" Steve Williams was also in the group but he's otherwise engaged tonight.

 

The Revolution def "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan & The Varsity Club (w/Leia Meow) in 4:52- More intergender here by the way as Asya is wrestling with her Revolution teammates. If anyone's keeping note this is Meow's (Kimona Wanalaya in ECW) WCW debut and I don't think she has an official name yet. For this match she's the Varsity Club's cheerleader. Duggan and Malenko start, but Malenko and Saturn quickly swap in a scrum with no tag. Shane Douglas is officially a part of the match, but his arm is still braced to due an injury and he takes his usual place in commentary instead. Duggan tries to do some arm work on Saturn. Saturn gets knocked around by all the Club guys from the apron. Duggan lets Saturn tag out to Malenko. Malenko tries a floatover in the corner but Duggan catches him, then hits a back elbow and slam. 3 point stance down already and the clothesline hits. Saturn breaks the pin up. They eventually get Duggan caught in the heel corner. Three of the eight people involved are doing all the work in this match. Saturn hits a springboard kick for 2. Clothesline from Saturn as Duggan looks like he's completely out of steam already. Duggan dodges a Saturn moonsault but again doesn't tag out. Malenko hits him from behind with their flagpole and Saturn covers for 2. All three Revolution members corner clothesline Duggan. The Club finally run in and it's EVERYONE IN THE POOL time. Except Douglas, he's firmly planted in commentary. Why did they even make him an official participant in this match? Sullivan, naturally, takes the job of hitting the woman. She gets put in the tree of woe and Sullivan gives her the running knee. They help Duggan up....then the Club attack Duggan! SWERVE! Well they were heels. Mandatory low blow on Duggan. Now Douglas leaves commentary, covers Duggan and gets the pin. Guess that's why he was in the match. Duggan now has to denounce the US on Nitro tomorrow night. Whether he did or not, honestly I don't remember or really care. Utter garbage. It's little wonder Malenko and Saturn were halfway out the door to WWF at this point. DUD

 

Mean Gene is in a dark corner in the bowels of the arena, where the Misfits have Oklahoma in a cage. You can keep him in there for all I care. 

 

Vampiro (w/The Misfits) def "Dr. Death" Steve Williams by DQ in 4:58- If Vampiro wins he gets five minutes with Oklahoma. The Misfits roll Oklahoma out in the cage. Unfortunately for everyone, he's got a wireless mic and is still on commentary despite being locked up. Another crossbody into the aisle start to a match tonight. Vampiro went over the cage for that at least so that was nice. Williams backdrops out of a double underhook but then gets planted by a Vampiro kick. Into the ring with Vampiro still in control and Oklahoma being pretty much the only one talking on commentary. Slow back and forth slugfest and chop exchange. It occurs to me this is an amazing old school vs new school visual in this match, the very straight Williams opposite the very unique Vampiro. Williams hits a shoulderblock out of the corner, goes down and hits a couple of low tackles. Vampiro dodges in the corner and hits a back suplex for 2. Both guys climb up and slug it out on the top rope. Belly to belly superplex from Williams! The Misfits run in and Williams tosses them back out. They're a band, not wrestlers. That leaves an opening for Vampiro to hit a spin kick. He tries another but Williams grabs him and tosses him. Ground and pound from Williams and he tosses ref Lil' Naitch away. After that happens the second time Naitch calls for the bell, DQing Williams. Lame as shit finish (Williams apparently refused to do the job), and a horrible match before that anyway. Under better circumstances I'd be curious to see what Williams had left in the tank for a properly run company. DUD again and we're barely halfway

 

Williams continues the assault so security comes out to escort him from the ring. Once Williams is gone Oklahoma demands the cage be opened to he can take advantage of Vampiro still being hurt.

 

Vampiro (w/The Misfits) def Oklahoma in 2:52- The hat is off and Oklahoma hits a kick. He grabs Vampiro and hits a DDT! He's still got the wireless mic on and is still doing commentary by the way. He calls for and does the OKLAHOMA STOMP, which is a crappy version of the old Garvin Stomp. Vampiro gets up and chops the shit out of Oklahoma. He falls out of the ring and the Misfits roll him back in like lumberjacks. His mic has also mercifully come undone. Even better, he doesn't realize it and keeps talking into the void. Oklahoma ducks a kick and I guess kicks Vampiro back. It was fugly whatever it was. Greco Roman Nut Punch from Oklahoma. Vampiro plants Oklahoma with a uranage. All the Misfits come in and start gang beating on Oklahoma in full view of the ref. Isn't this supposed to be a proper match? Don't ask, it's Russo I guess. Vampiro hits Nail in the Coffin and gets the pin. I'm not bothering to rate this shit, but it was so bad even seeing Oklahoma getting his comeuppance wasn't satisfying. NR

 

In Dr. Claw's office, he's got nothing for his henchmen Hennig and Creative Control because "there's something big going down tonight" and he's distracted. Elsewhere, Harlem Heat bitch at each other before heading out for the match. Stevie Ray doesn't much care for Midnight apparently.

 

Creative Control & Curt Hennig (w/Shane) def Harlem Heat & Midnight in 8:00- Despite the fact this is a mixed 6 person match this is somehow for the #1 contendership for the WCW tag titles (the Outsiders are currently champs again and yes I had to look that up). You want more cheap Russo WWF mockery? Creative Control's names are Patrick and Gerald. Yes, Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco. Then in case it wasn't obvious enough, Vincent's name was changed to Shane as their manager. I'll give you one guess what Shane he's supposed to be. Stevie Ray doesn't even come out, making this a default handicap mach. Creative Control wrestle in their business attire. Booker and....one of the CC guys start. They're twins (the Harris brothers) and I'm not even bothering trying to tell who is who, especially when commentary is going to do everything but call the match. Booker hits a side kick for 2 but quickly gets double teamed. Running forearm from Booker on CC guy #2, followed by some armdrags. He tags Midnight in. She holds an arm wringer and kicks before the CC guy backs her into the corner. Quickly back to the Midnight arm wringer. It's so obvious she's fresh out of basic training and out here way too soon. CC guy #1 pulls Booker out to the floor and the heels gang up on him down there. Hennig tags in and hits a kneelift. Big boot from one of the CC guys for 2. Booker hits the scissors kick and tags out. Midnight hits a dropkick but gets drug back up by Hennig. She knocks Virgil/Vincent/Shane off the apron, allowing Hennig to hit her from behind and send her to the floor. Another gang beatdown on the floor. Big chop from Hennig on Midnight. Commentary loses interest and starts talking about other angles going on tonight. We get the classic facelock fight and Midnight gets a tag that Nick Patrick doesn't see EVEN THOUGH HE WASN'T DISTRACTED AND WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE WHAT IN THE BLUE HELL. Ray is finally out but Booker tells him to piss off. The extended beating on Midnight continues and Booker saves a pin. Midnight dodges one of the CC guys trying a horrendous elbow off the second rope. Tag to Booker but this time Patrick was distracted for real, by Ray. Spinebuster from Booker. Hennig hits Booker with a knucks assisted punch. Booker gets pinned and it's over. The cavalcade of total trash tonight continues, but I'm desperate for some variety so I'm going to be very, very generous. 1/4* (yes that's generous)

 

I said in my Mayhem review I wanted to get into the crazy story of Dustin Rhodes' return to WCW and now I can. After playing Goldust and other equally weird characters in WWF for years, Dustin came back to WCW in October. To continue the weird trend, he was initially going to be a white face painted/masked character named Seven. Introductory vignettes were filmed with Seven stalking children's bedrooms. As soon as Turner execs saw this they immediately shut it down, rightly not wanting a straight up child molester character on their shows. So, when Dustin showed up in the arena for the first time, he had the full Seven gear on, but he then proceeded to bury the entire gimmick and reinvented himself as just plain old Dustin Rhodes. Russo never missed the chance to do some kind of work shoot or shooty work. Being Russo WCW, there were also shots at WWF and Goldust involved.

 

Bunkhouse Brawl: Jeff Jarrett def Dustin Rhodes in 11:18- Under better circumstances this could potentially be a really good match. The Bunkhouse Brawl was one of many creations of Dusty Rhodes in his long time as a booker, so it's appropriate Dustin gets it back out. Jarrett attacks Dustin during his backstage interview, since it's a Bunkhouse match I guess that means it's on. Dustin gets run into the table Norman Smiley broke earlier. Through the curtain and into the arena. The bell rings to officially start as they brawl around the stage area. Jarrett has a wheelbarrow full of....pieces of wood. Not kendo sticks, this is a southern match. Dustin gets knocked over the wheelbarrow. Jarrett takes a fan's drink and throws it in Dustin's face. Strangely that was a sign for Dustin to take control. He slams Jarrett into the wheelbarrow! Dustin picks up the gear in the wheelbarrow (the wood, a rope with a cowbell, and duct tape) and they both go into the ring. He breaks one of the small pieces of wood over Jarrett's back. He ties one end of the rope around Jarrett's wrist. Cowbell shot! They go back to the floor with more cowbell shots for Jarrett. Back in the ring Dustin goes in one of his jeans pockets, gets powder and throws it in Jarrett's face. Now he whips Jarrett with his belt. The ref tries to intervene and Dustin whips him! It's a Bunkhouse Brawl ref, get out of the way. Dustin uses the duct tape to tape the REF to the top rope! Well that's different. The ref won't shut up so Dustin tapes his mouth too. OK, that's funny. Hudson amazingly asks a logical question, how can the ref call for the bell and a winner in this state? Russo's probably laying into him on the headset for bringing that up. Jarrett back kick low blows Dustin to get some space. Curt Hennig now makes his way out and helps the ref get free. Hennig and Jarrett are both PTB golden children is the connection here. Jarrett puts the sleeper on just as Hennig gets the ref fully free. Arm drops and Dustin puts up a middle finger when he fights back up. You're not Steve Austin, son. Jarret gets the sleeper back on but Dustin lifts and tosses him to get free. Dustin slugs back and side slams Jarrett. Hennig pulls Dustin out of the pin. He stacks Jarrett up and this time Hennig punches him. Jarrett uses that to roll Dustin up and we get an excruciatingly long 2 count, like the ref doesn't even know the damn finish. He was even looking over toward the timekeeper's area during the count like he wasn't sure what to do. Dustin sets Jarrett up in the corner for what was called Shattered Dreams, punches Hennig aside and hits it. Hennig this time pulls the ref out. Dustin flips Hennig into the ring and gives him Shattered Dreams. Jarrett and Dustin totally fluff a spot where Jarrett was supposed to backdrop Dustin over the top to the floor. They fight back up the aisle to where they started. Dustin starts climbing the set girders, but only gets one step up before changing his mind and just kicking Jarrett away. A guitar has appeared out of nowhere. In a Jarrett match? I know, shocking. Hennig shows back up and Dustin bulldogs him on the floor. Jarrett climbs up the ladder for the later ladder match, comes off the ladder with the vintage Jeff Jarrett guitar shot, and that gets the pin. Well....it's better than most of the show has been. Still nowhere in the vicinity of the same zip code as good. *1/2

 

Crowbar on a Pole Match: Diamond Dallas Page def David Flair in 3:55- There's an off camera secondary pyro explosion after DDP gets in the ring that I'm not sure if it was intentional are not. While DDP does his usual post-entrance lounging in the corner crazy David comes in through the crowd and attacks him with his shiny new golden crowbar! Lil' Naitch takes that one away and points out the official crowbar on the pole. DDP is barely moving on the floor. Lil' Naitch calls David Penzer over. Penzer starts to announce that DDP can't continue and the match is awarded to David by forfeit. DDP says screw that, shoves Penzer aside mid announcement and gets in the ring. The bell rings to start for a second time. David attacks DDP in the corner, amazingly with his bare hands with no crowbar. DDP dodges in the corner and gets a quick roll up for 2. David is quickly back on him. DDP tries a slam but his ribs give out and David falls on top for 2. Sunset flip (!) from David. DDP blocks that, but David cradles him for 2. DDT from David for 2. DDP drags himself up on the corner and tries a comeback, but David cuts it off with a clothesline for 2. DDP spins and hits his own clothesline. Low blow from David. We were sadly overdue for that. David slams DDP, looks longingly at the crowbar, but then changes his mind and puts a figure four on DDP! DDP reverses it and David breaks. Now David decides to go for the crowbar and gets it. DDP ducks and hits the Diamond Cutter! Cover and it's over. Good job from DDP dragging the kid to something halfway decent. I will give it to David, he's making this psycho character work and his wrestling has improved since he first started. Still doesn't have any business being in the ring for a major company yet though. **

 

DDP gives David an avalanche Diamond Cutter to make sure he's good and dead FOR KIMBERLY. He then takes the crowbar and goes to smash David's ability to have kids once and for all. A woman runs in and covers David up to save him! Commentary has no idea who she is, but it's the one and only DAFFNEY! Yes, Daffney is here. One of the very few bright spots of the period.

 

Sting (w/Elizabeth) def The Total Package by DQ in 5:21- Sting vs Luger round #572. Elizabeth is in the center of all this. Since apparently turning on Luger at Mayhem with a misfired spray of mace, Liz has been trying to get away from him completely but is locked into one of those ironclad contracts. Because of that Luger's taken every opportunity to force humiliation on her. Apparently after tonight, her contract is up. While walking out Sting hands Liz a can that's presumably mace and says "This is the good stuff". As per Russo contractual obligation, Luger jumps Sting as he gets in the ring. After a bunch of stomping Luger tosses Sting out to the floor and gives him the usual ringside knockaround. Back in it's still all Luger with a slam and elbow drops. Buckle shots finally wake Sting up a bit. Luger sees it and hits a suplex. Sting pops back up. Liz is on the apron and they bounce Luger between them with slaps! Dropkick from Sting. Horrible double clothesline. Liz gets in the ring with the mace can Sting gave her. She has some words with Luger, then turns around into Sting. Liz tries to turn on Sting, but Sting for the first time ever in his life was ready for the betrayal and it's just a can of silly string! It was so obvious Liz was playing him even Sting saw it coming. He back elbows Luger down while jawing with Liz. Clotheslines from Sting on Luger. Big splash off the top rope for 2. Running faceplant. Stinger Splash! A second! He goes for the Scorpion Death Lock. Now Liz is in the ring with Sting's bat. Sting tells her to drop the bat and get out. She drops the bat, but when Sting turns around picks it back up and whacks him with it! That is so obviously a rubber bat too. That draws the DQ. Afterward Liz gets a chair and Luger uses it to Pillmanize Sting's arm. Shit match, but I'll give it a bit for amusing me with Sting finally seeing someone turning on him coming. *

 

Powerbomb Match: WCW World Tag Team Champion Kevin Nash def Sid Vicious in 6:58- This is the feud that gave us the legendary Sid promo "You are half the man that I am, and I have half the brains that you do". For some reason the second part is cut out of the recap video. Nash's Sid mask is something else too. The rules of this match are simple on the surface: both guys use a powerbomb as a finisher, so whoever hits the powerbomb first wins. Of course this is both Russo and WCW so you know it won't end up that simple. No jump start for the first time tonight. LOCKUP! It's all downhill from here. Nash gets the first shots in and quickly goes to the slow corner knees and elbows. Weird takedown clothesline from Nash for 2. Sid ducks under and goes for a powerbomb. Nash does the obvious low blow counter. Check that off for this match. Nash hooks up for a powerbomb on the floor. Sid powers out and pushes Nash into the ring apron. Sid does the usual Sid things on the floor, mixing in a soft chairshot to Nash's back for some variety. Clothesline from Sid back in, followed by a legdrop. Sid calls for a powerbomb, then hits a slam. I think he's confused. Nash eye pokes Sid, then gets whipped into the ref. While the ref's down Sid has a hell of a time getting Nash up, then does hit the powerbomb. Jeff Jarrett runs in and smashes his second guitar tonight over Sid. The ref's acting trying to look hurt in the corner is hilariously over the top. Tone it down a couple of notches. Nash tries to get Sid up for a powerbomb but his back gives out. Instead he drags the ref up, shows Sid lying on the mat, and says he powerbombed him. The ref....believes him and calls for the bell? Fire this ref. So much for "you can't call what you didn't see". In a match where you win by hitting your finisher, Nash doesn't bother to do the work and instead uses his political acumen to convince the ref he did the work. I can't think of more pure Kevin Nash thing to do. DUD

 

Ladder Match for the WCW United States Heavyweight Championship: Chris Benoit (c) def Jeff Jarrett in 10:14- It's really amazing how the second Russo took over WCW Jarrett was suddenly all over its programming. Even more amazingly, as soon as I typed that Jarrett's music hit and Tony went "Jarrett? AGAIN?". Freaking hilarious. Short promo from Jarrett on the ladder and we get a jump start in the aisle. Benoit takes over in the ring and hits a backbreaker. First chops from Benoit and he hits a superplex. After that Benoit steps out to get the ladder. The ONLY ladder. WWF was already stacking a bunch around the ring, but honestly I prefer only one and then pull the "backup" out when needed. Jarrett catches Benoit coming back in and baseball slides the ladder into Benoit. He slams Benoit on the ladder while it's hanging out of the ring! Ouch. Benoit got busted open somewhere in there. The ladder is propped up in the corner and Benoit whips Jarrett into it a couple of times. The second time Jarrett goes over the top to the floor. Benoit sets the ladder up and climbs. Jarrett lifts him off and drops him crotch first on the top rope. He drops the ladder a couple of times on Benoit. Tony mentions the way Benoit's bleeding he might have a broken nose, and he might be right. Jarrett puts the ladder in the corner and RUNS Benoit into it. After some counters Jarrett lifts Benoit up, wraps Benoit's leg inside the ladder, then pulls the ladder down with Benoit trapped in it! Very nice. Jarrett sets up and climbs. Benoit lifts him up, loses his grip, then goes again and ties Jarrett's legs in the ladder and lets him dangle in a tree of woe type situation off the ladder. Benoit climbs, but Jarrett uses his position to work the ladder closed and it collapses dropping both of them. Reset and both guys climb. Huge slugfest on the ladder. Benoit drops, then lifts the ladder up to drop Jarrett. Benoit climbs again and he really is covered nicely in blood. That's definitely not from his forehead or anywhere up there, a broken nose is a real possibility. Jarrett pushes the ladder down and Benoit crashes into the ropes. Benoit then returns the favor and Jarrett just about gets crotched on the top rope. Benoit climbs the ladder, but Jarrett climbs the top rope. Missile dropkick on the ladder, dropping Benoit! Off a whip Benoit rolls under the ladder, then dropkicks the ladder into Jarrett! Jarrett's out. Benoit climbs up and stands on the very top of the ladder. But he doesn't take the belt. He wants more damage. Diving headbutt off the top of the ladder! Benoit climbs again, and this time takes the belt to win! Finally, something worthwhile. That was easily the best match of the WCW Russo era so far. It's short for a ladder match and the ending could have been tweaked or extended a bit, but they crammed a ton into 10 minutes, including a lot of really creative stuff. It's an appropriate warm up for all the great ladder matches Benoit will have in WWF. ****

 

Was it really so hard for Russo to figure out that things like the last match was all we wanted? 

 

No DQ Match for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship: Bret "Hitman" Hart (c) def Goldberg in 12:30- This is one of those matches that's become infamous, but no one knew it for a while. Buffer's back for the first time in a while. Damn, I'd hoped Russo had let him walk. Any backstage issues aside this is a pretty money match on paper and not the worst way to go at Starrcade. We resist the Russo jump start. The ref gives instructions and we get a Code of Honor handshake before the bell as this is face vs face. Short jockey around and lockup. Goldberg unsurprisingly wins that and we get a clean corner break. Another lockup and Goldberg tosses Bret out. Bret takes Goldberg down with a headlock. Goldberg pushes out and plants Bret with a shoulderblock. Press powerslam. Bret tries to reverse a whip but Goldberg uses it to hit a short clothesline. Rolling takedown from Goldberg into a legbar. Bret tries to counter it into a Sharpshooter! Goldberg pushes free and Bret rolls out to rethink things. Goldberg follows and presses the attack on the floor. Everyone does some obvious positioning and Bret whips Goldberg right into the ref on the floor. Neither guy cares and keeps going. Lil' Naitch quickly comes in as the replacement ref as Goldberg knocks Bret around ringside. Big boot from Goldberg back in. Goldberg suplexes Bret and knocks Lil' Naitch down in the process. Bret dodges a spear attempt and Goldberg crashes in the corner. Ref #3 is in. Post wraparound figure four! Bret needs time to legit recover on the floor after hitting hard for real. Back in Bret gets back on the knee. Snap mare and Bret hooks on the proper figure four. After a bit of a fight Goldberg easily reverses and Bret takes a rope break. Goldberg fights a leg takedown and punches Bret down. Bret gets up and gets back on the knee. Then switches tacks and pounds Goldberg in the corner. Goldberg goozles Bret and reverses! Bret kicks the knee and eye rakes to get back in control. Ref #3 goes down because why not. After that the single most important thing in this match and on this show happens: Goldberg superkicks Bret. Doesn't sound like much right? Well, this was the kick that caught Bret flush in the head, concussed him, and gave him the head injury that would force him to retire, eventually causing Bret to have multiple strokes and become the bitter old man that will hate Goldberg for all eternity that we know today. Goldberg sets up to finish it. Spear! Goldberg realizes they've gone through all the refs. Wait a second. Roddy Piper is coming out, in a ref's shirt and looking not in any way interested to be involved in any of this. Bret clips Goldberg's knee and puts the Sharpshooter on. Piper calls for the bell without ever checking with Goldberg, takes the belt and leaves. Hudson: "This is Montreal all over again". It's only been two years but the constant Montreal references were beyond ridiculous at this point. Just, enough already. Bret follows the still completely disinterested Piper out and stops him on the stage. Piper sticks the belt in Bret's chest and gets out at quick as he can. End show. The match started promising enough, dragged a bit in the middle, then completely crashed and burned with that horrible Russo ending. **1/4

 

Sadly, this would be the final PPV match in the unquestioned all time great career of Bret Hart due to the aforementioned injury. He'd continue to try to wrestle as the damage wasn't fully apparent at first, with his last regular match taking place in mid January. He'd continue to sporadically appear for WCW in speaking roles after until his contract was voided (in pure WCW fashion, by mail) in October 2000 and would officially retire shortly after. In the immediate years after Bret made the odd appearance on the indy scene to say hi and sign autographs, but he wouldn't be seen again on a major show until his WWE Hall of Fame induction in 2006, then his larger WWE return in 2010 where he'd make an attempt to bury the hatchet with some people, mainly Vince and Shawn, and even work a handful of matches as best he could while supporting the family just starting to get traction in the company at that time- Natalya, Tyson Kidd and David Hart Smith AKA Davey Boy Smith Jr.

 

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- Any vestige of hope that Russo might actually be able to fix WCW pretty much died with this show. Only the great ladder match keeps it from not only being among the absolute worst shows of all time, but from being the worst Starrcade of all time. '97 still keeps that "honor", especially when weighing expectations versus reality. As the year, decade, century and millennium come to a close I offer this comforting thought for WCW and WCW viewers: it's still going to get worse.

OVERALL SHOW GRADE: D- 

Vengeance '01

Legacy Review

Vengeance '01

December 9, 2001 from the San Diego Sports Arena in San Diego, CA

 

Commentary: Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler

 

Armageddon had been the name for the last couple of December PPVs, but with this show coming just months after 9/11 WWF decided the time wasn't right for that. Instead this will be the first PPV under the Vengeance name. Next year Vengeance will take over as the July PPV name, and Armageddon will be reinstated for December. Interestingly, the poster for this show features Triple H even though he was still a month away from his return. Jerry Lawler is back on commentary, taking back over from Paul Heyman on the Raw after Survivor Series. Lawler's absence from the company was completely unrelated to anything WCW, but having Heyman on commentary from the WCW buyout through the end of the Invasion angle really was perfect timing.

 

The Invasion angle wrapped up at Survivor Series, which also included unifying the midcard and tag titles on that show. But, that still left the top titles, which is what we'll be dealing with tonight. Just before getting on the on ramp toward the Royal Rumble and Wrestlemania season. Both the WWF Championship and the World Championship (rechristened from the WCW Championship) will be defended tonight in separate matches, then the winners of those matches will meet in the main event to determine the first ever Undisputed Champion. In addition, we have the new post-Invasion story of Ric Flair now being a 50/50 co-owner of the WWF alongside Vince, thanks to Shane and Steph selling all their stock to him to fund their ultimately failed WCW and ECW purchases. Where Flair got the money to buy all that stock despite all the alimony he's got to pay will forever remain an unanswered question.

 

I've lost track of how many of these "Freddie Blassie watching" openings we've gotten the past couple of years. Still, this one mostly works thanks to the incorporation of classic footage and the hook of crowning the first ever in wrestling history undisputed champion tonight (in WWF's mind, but at this point in time you'd be hard pressed to find another company that mattered worth a damn, especially in the US). Could have done without all the weird interpretive dance bits going on around him though.

 

Vince's music interrupts commentary's usual intro and he makes his way out to the ring. He had just started the Vince McMahon Kiss My Ass Club, forcing William Regal to become the first member in order to be reinstated into WWF after he jumped to the Alliance during the Invasion. On the SD before this show a group including Austin, Rock, Undertaker and, naturally, Rikishi and his ass got some revenge and Vince is none to pleased about it. After some ranting at the audience to respect him, including saying "You'll laugh when I tell you to laugh!" which feels like a shoot comment, Flair interrupts, says people came here to see a PPV, and tells the first wrestlers to come out. Vince storms off in a huff after Scotty and Albert get in the ring.

 

Scotty2Hotty & Albert def WWF European Champion Christian & Test in 6:12- Want some random teams? We got random teams. The last couple of months of the Invasion the Alliance largely turned into a vehicle to try to move Test up to the next level (again), but as usual with these things Vince had already lost interest. Big Attitude Era style jump start in the aisle. We settle in with Christian and Scotty in the ring, with the arena completely covered in smoke from the pyro. I don't know how the upper section can see anything. Scotty outwrestles Christian so Christian bails and tags Test in. Scotty dodges and also tags out. Albert does a Vader style tackle on Test and hits a big splash for 2. He doesn't appreciate Christian breaking the pin up and shoves him off the apron. Scotty tries mounted punches on Test but Christian pulls him down and Test clotheslines him. That sends Scotty in peril for a bit while JR and Lawler amuse themselves by trying to come up with team names for the Scotty/Albert combination. It's so good to hear the two of them together again. Heyman was clearly superior to Lawler in match analysis, the core function of the job, but JR and Lawler are such a great team that play off each other so well. Scotty goes into dodge mode on Test and manages to hit him with a superkick. Tags on both sides. Albert runs Christian over and jabs away on Test. He squashes both heels in the corner. Giant swing on Christian! OK, credit to him for getting that out. Dizzy Albert falls on Christian for a long 2 count. He fights off a heel double team with a double clothesline. Albert sets up for the Baldo Bomb but Test pulls him out to the floor. Scotty runs into a Christian reverse DDT and Christian does the mandatory heel attempt to do Scotty's worm. Albert breaks that up and we're in full on DONNYBROOK mode. Test big boots Albert but Scotty barely breaks the pin up. Christian gets backdropped over the top rope, Scotty drops Test in the drop zone and the W O R M hits. But, Test rolls out of the ring as soon as it's hit. Christian gets in and goes for the Unprettier on Scotty. Albert breaks that up, plants Christian with the Baldo Bomb, and gets the pin. Meh. *3/4

 

WWF Intercontinental Championship: Edge (c) def William Regal in 9:06- Nice rough lockup to start. The ref forces a break, but they go right back into it. Edge gets the first shots in and hits a missile dropkick off the second rope. Regal rolls out for a think, then throws Edge into the post. European uppercut from Regal back in. Edge comes back with a backdrop. Regal gets a straight right hand for 2. Knees to Edge's face and another European uppercut. Edge counters out of a full nelson and tries a sunset flip. Regal grabs Edge's hair to block it and drops a knee on him for 2. Edge gets a flash small package for 2. Regal running knee to Edge's head for 2. Suplex from Regal for 2. Edge blocks a kick and hits a swinging neckbreaker. Clothesline as Edge starts to build momentum. He hurricanranas Regal off the top rope for a long 2. Northern lights suplex for 2. A back elbow from Regal puts Edge back down. Edge uses his legs to leverage Regal over the top down to the floor. He tries coming off the apron but Regal dodges and Edge crashes into the stairs. Regal takes advantage of the ref checking on Edge to find the brass knucks he planted under the ring skirt. Sneaky place to hide them. Back in Regal covers and Edge just barely gets a foot on the rope just as 3 hits. Double underhook powerbomb from Regal for 2. Desperation enzuguri from Edge and both guys are down. Roll up from Edge for 2. Backslide for 2. Regal puts Edge back down with a forearm. Another double underhook powerbomb from Regal. A third. Edge kicks out again. Frustrated Regal stomps the hell out of Edge. He gets the knucks out of his tights. Spear outta nowhere! Edge gets the pin to retain! Just fine but no more. Edge, honestly, continues to underwhelm a bit early in his singles run. We know he'll get there eventually. **1/2

 

Kurt Angle storms into Flair's office and tries his best to rile Flair up, but Flair keeps agreeing with him on everything. Finally Angle has enough and leaves. Funny stuff.

 

Jeff Hardy def Matt Hardy in 12:30- Another big post-Invasion angle, the first of what would be many breakups of the Hardy Boyz. This one stemmed from Jeff choosing an adrenaline high over winning in the tag title match at Survivor Series. Not the last time Jeff would choose a cheap high over doing the right thing. Even though it was Jeff's screw up that started this Matt's the one being positioned as the heel, which will be common practice during all their feuds. It's also put Matt's girlfriend Lita in the middle of it all, and because of that she will be the special guest referee for this match. Lita's ref outfit is...unique. Jeff is still trying to make the baseball cap happen. Lockup into a nice basic start. Top wristlock fight into hammerlock reversals. Matt gets a leg takedown and walks over Jeff. That also knocked the cap off. Speed run and Jeff gets an armdrag into an ARMBAR. Matt tries to counter but Jeff rolls through and hangs on. Matt goes full heel by going to a hair pull and back elbowing Jeff. Slam/fistdrop combo from Matt for 2. Chops in the corner from Matt. Jeff reverses and hits his own chops. Eye poke from Matt and he drops Jeff on the top rope. Diving clothesline for 2. Matt hooks on a sleeper. Jeff escapes and puts on his own sleeper. Matt back suplexes out. Jeff dodges the legdrop off the second rope. Jawbreaker from Jeff. His legdrop off the second rope hits for 2. Jeff hops up top but Matt pushes him down into the tree of woe, then gets pissed at Lita for wanting to get Jeff down. That gets Matt some good boos from the crowd. Roll up from Matt for 2. He tries to toss Jeff over the top but Jeff lands on the apron. Matt tries for a sunset bomb. Jeff blocks it and hurricanranas Matt on the floor! Jeff flips over Matt back in the ring and hurts his knee on the landing. Matt sees the target and goes right for it. Chop block on Jeff and some more shots on the knee. Matt then changes tacks and goes for a piledriver. Jeff works free and hits a Russian leg sweep for 2. He ledgrops Matt's legs into a stack up cover for 2. Matt gets back on the knee and puts on a half crab. Jeff crawls over and gets a rope break. Matt goes for a figure four (on the wrong knee) but Jeff pushes him out to the floor. Jeff hobbles over to hit a baseball slide. He tries for a plancha but his knee can't take it. Matt grabs the leg again but Jeff gets a desperation kick. Stand up slugfest. Matt hooks up for the Twist of Fate. Jeff counters into the crotch legdrop and hits a back suplex. He drags himself and his bad knee up to the top rope. Matt catches him and slams him off the top Flair style. Another Twist of Fate attempt. Jeff counters and goes for a Twist of Fate. Matt counters that into a backslide for 2. They have a bit of trouble deciding where to go after that. Eventually Matt gets Jeff down and tries for a rope leverage pin, but it's blatantly obvious and Lita breaks it up. Matt didn't like that at all. That allows Jeff to get a roll up for 2. Jeff goes up top again but again Matt catches him. He goes for an avalanche Twist of Fate. Jeff blocks it. Swanton Bomb! Matt gets a foot on the rope, but Jeff pulls it off before Lita can see and gets the pin! Matt tries to argue after but Lita can't call what she didn't see. There were bits in there I really liked, especially them trying to do a more old school style match rather than the crazy spotfest you'd expect from them, but they didn't hold it together as well as they could have. The knee work reminded me of the Rock N Roll Express breakup match at Great American Bash '91, but this wasn't near the flop that one was. It also suffered from the crowd clearly not caring, especially after Edge & Christian already had a big breakup not long before this. It was too soon. They'd quickly realize that and the Hardyz would be back together by the first of the year. **1/4

 

WWF Tag Team Championship: The Dudley Boyz (c) (w/Stacy Keibler) def The Big Show & Kane in 6:50- For those keeping track this is the third time in recent months Show's tried to take either the WWF or WCW tag titles from the Dudleyz, and with his third different partner. He's clearly trying a new strategy, going from small guys Spike Dudley and Tajiri to Kane. D'Von tries to maneuver around Kane at the start but it doesn't work out for him. Kane easily takes out both Dudleyz. Show pounds on Bubba Ray and hits a powerslam for 2. Bubba Ray sees a goozle coming and grabs the ropes to stop himself. He wants to tag but D'Von refuses to tag back in! Bubba Ray eye pokes Show and now D'Von will tag. He walks right into a Show side suplex for 2. Corner squash from Show. Show whips Kane into corner clotheslines on both Dudleyz. Kane whips both Dudleyz into the same corner, then whips Show to squash them both. The Dudleyz go to the floor and Kane hits them both with a double clothesline off the top rope. For some reason Stacy gets in the ring to scream at the Dudleyz to get up. Show pulls her skirt down from behind, then puts her over his knee and spanks her! I'm not into the spanking part personally, but seeing Stacy in her underwear.....uh......yeah. Give me a second to refocus. After my mental cold shower the Dudleyz manage to hit Kane with the reverse 3D to finally get some offense going for the first time. Bubba Ray then takes Kane's knee out and the Dudleyz hit the Whazzup Drop. Double flapjack from the Dudleyz and they set up for the 3D. Kane big boots D'Von and clotheslines Bubba Ray to cut that off. Tag to show. Clotheslines for everyone. Big backdrop on D'Von. Corner avalanche on Bubba Ray. Goozle on D'Von. Bubba Ray chop blocks Show to stop the chokeslam. Everyone in the pool! The Dudleyz maneuver Kane into clotheslining Show from the top rope. Bubba Ray tries to cover but Kane tosses him out. Kane goes over to help Show and tries to apologize. Show doesn't want to hear it. The Dudleyz jump while they argue but easily get fought off again. Big boot from Show on Bubba Ray. Now Show accidentally knocks Kane off the apron. He goes for Stacy again but D'Von saves her. Bubba Ray takes a top turnbuckle pad off. Both Dudleyz lift Show up, drop him on the exposed buckle, and get the pin. JR: "It was not a pretty match". No it wasn't. The Dudleyz continue to struggle to have decent matches with any teams other than Edge & Christian or the Hardyz. 1/2*

 

The Undertaker's had an interesting ride since the Invasion ended. Vince creating the Kiss My Ass Club caused Taker to snap, because he saw himself as the biggest Vince ass kisser of them all and that embarrassed him. When Vince tried to force JR to join the Kiss My Ass club, Taker stopped JR and asked if he was really going to do it. When JR said "HELL NO!", Taker then asked "Why? You think you're better than me?" and attacked JR, turning heel. Since then Taker's targeted RVD as the new hot shot in WWF, constantly attacking RVD all while demanding everyone respect him.

 

WWF Hardcore Championship: The Undertaker def Rob Van Dam (c) in 11:08- The Hardcore title is a big come down for Taker, but that aside the feud makes sense. The crowd's pretty behind RVD. Good power vs speed stuff at the start. RVD does his backflip out of the corner but runs into a Taker big boot. Taker drops an elbow for 2. RVD gets a back elbow in the corner, hops up top and hits a super flippy senton for 2. Spinning heel kick for 2. RVD goes out of his wheelhouse and puts on a headlock. Taker uses that to drop him crotch first on the top rope and big boots him down to the floor. That leads to some back and forth ringside knockaraound. Oh yeah, this is right when JR started calling Taker "Booger Red". RVD clotheslines Taker over the barricade into the crowd. He tries to springboard off the barricade but Taker catches him with a gut shot. Some crowd brawl stuff follows. Taker takes a fan's Mexico flag and chokes RVD with it! RVD hits an asai moonsault off the hockey wall! Taker sends RVD flying over some spare guardrail pieces and stays in control as they fight to the side of the stage. RVD fires off a fire extinguisher and hits Taker with it. Trash can shot for Taker. That looked like a proper can, not one of the super thin ones they usually use. RVD then climbs the arena steps all the way up to the top of the floor entranceway. Crossbody dive onto Taker for 2! A ton of dust from something flew up where they hit. Now they work behind the stage and up the steps onto a side part of the stage proper. Taker crashes into some spare bits and bobs up there and RVD covers for 2. Through the curtain to the main entrance area. RVD hits a legdrop for 2. Taker scoops RVD up and runs him headfirst into one of the trons! He sets up for a Last Ride on the stage. RVD grabs the side of the tron to get free! Clothesline from Taker. Taker goes behind the curtain and comes back with a chair. RVD kicks it into Taker's face! Rolling thunder on the stage! That gets a 2 count. The Vandaminator hits for 2. Taker dodges another kick attempt and gives RVD some chairshots. Both guys look for something big near the edge of the stage, each countering the other. Eventually Taker wins, chokeslamming RVD off the side of the stage into a stack of tables below! Taker covers and gets the pin to win the Hardcore title! Good stuff. It's fun seeing Taker in the almost alternate Hardcore universe as that was something new for him. Pure RVD style match too, Taker let RVD lead for most of it and played along great. Being the Hardcore champ will give him even more license to earn respect the hard way. RVD can also check "jobbed to Taker" off his mandatory WWF to do list before even being considered to move up to the next level. ***

 

Jericho storms into Flair's office, annoyed at the world for thinking he doesn't have a chance in hell tonight. Flair's "If you can pull it off more power to you" response doesn't help any. 

 

WWF Women's Championship: Trish Stratus (c) def Jacqueline in 3:34- Lawler commends both womens' "well developed lungs". Oh yeah, he's back. Lockup and clean break. After a Trish shoulderblock Jacqueline gets a roll up for 2. She NAILS Trish with a couple of forearms and hits a backdrop. A "we want puppies" chant gets Lawler going like you'd expect while Trish hits a couple of kicks. She tries to follow up but Jacqueline shoves her away *hard*. One of Trish's kicks must have caught her flush. She also shoves the ref away, then plants Trish with a forearm and pummels her with some very straight stomps. Slams from Jacqueline. Trish takes advantage of Jacqueline dragging her up by the arm to hit a short clothesline for 2. Trish goes for a high kick but Jacqueline ducks and sweeps her other leg out, resulting in a nasty looking landing for Trish that gets a big gasp from the crowd. They're not chanting for puppies now. Trish dodges in the corner and tries for what looks like a sort of Gedo clutch, but neither of them can pull it off right. Clothesline from Jacqueline, once again very stiff. Another backdrop. Trish flips out of a suplex attempt and both women exchange chops. Trish goes for the Stratusfaction but Jacqueline pushes out. Basement dropkick to Trish's back for 2. Off a corner whip Trish flies back and they have an ugly looking collision. Backslide from Trish and that gets the pin! I don't know if they planned to work so stiff or it just happened out of mutual annoyance, but damn that part worked beautifully. They do have a handshake after the bell so it might have been the plan. When they tried wrestling moves it didn't go very well half the time, but the striking was on point and that absolutely got the crowd into it and respecting it as a proper wrestling match instead of just hoping someone's top came off. **

 

Now for the main part of tonight's proceedings, the mini tournament to crown the first ever Undisputed Champion. But before that is an extremely long video recap that shows just how far this whole "Kiss My Ass Club" thing has already gone. It's ridiculous and pure Vince McMahon humor. The whole pomp and circumstance leading up to the start of the title matches is really good, making this feel as much of a big deal as possible considering it's on the December PPV, traditionally a dead time on the schedule before getting into Rumble season.

 

WWF Championship: "Stone Cold" Steve Austin (c) def Kurt Angle in 14:55- Running back the main WWF Title feud from the Invasion one more time. Lawler mentions they attempted to get this "unified thing" done when he was AWA World champ, which is a nice callback, and true. Instead of Austin's usual jump start he and Angle go nose to nose in the middle of the ring while the crowd eats every bit of it up. Cautious start after the bell. Very cautious. Lockup! I can't remember the last time I saw Austin lock up. Neither guy will break in the corner and they roll across the ropes to the other corner. Finally we have an extremely slow, cautious break but no one tries anything. Another lockup and this time ref Mike Chioda forces Angle to break. Austin, far from upset, is happy at Angle showing so much fire. One more lockup and this time Austin lays in some strikes to crank things up a notch. Off a whip Angle grabs the ropes and slides out of the ring to pretty big boos from the crowd. Back in Angle gets a waistlock takedown and Austin quickly rolls out to rethink things. Coming back in Austin tells Angle he's #1 with both hands. Speed run and Austin catches Angle with a back elbow. Chops from Austin. Angle grabs a kick attempt. Austin quickly rolls to get free because he knew what Angle was going for. Angle ducks a clothesline and puts on another waistlock. Austin grabs Angle's arm to power free and twists into an arm wringer. Angle reverses into his own arm wringer and Austin quickly eye pokes him. Neither guy afraid to heel it up. He continue working on Angle's arm. Angle's clearly inspired Austin, it's great to see Austin the pure wrestler come out again as much as he was capable of anymore. More Austin chops in the corner. He momentum tosses Angle over the top to the floor. Austin follows and runs Angle's arm into the post. Angle catches Austin coming back in with stomps. Armbar slam from Austin! Cover for 2. Yet more chops from Austin. Austin ducks under and gets a waistlock. Angle counters and gets Austin down into the ankle lock! Middle of the ring! Austin crawls for the ropes but Angle drags him back. Austin tries again and this time gets a rope break. Angle charges but Austin backdrops him over the top rope to the floor. Spanish announce table shots for Angle. Angle maneuvers Austin across the ring and posts his knee! Now Angle hits some chops from the floor. Post wraparound figure four! Hi Bret Hart. Back in Angle puts the ankle lock back on. Austin rolls over and manages to kick free. Belly to belly suplex from Angle. Austin tries to chop back but Angle eye rakes him. He stomps Austin down in the corner. Austin comes back up slugging. Whip reversal and Austin Bret bumps into ROLLLLLLLING GERMANS. All three hit. Cover for 2. Angle goes up top. Moonsault! Austin dodges! Speed run. Austin Thesz press! Spinebuster for 2. Austin ducks under a shot and hits a German! Another! He goes for three but Angle back elbows out. Austin grabs him again and hits three! It wasn't pretty but he just got it. How about four? Five! Austin remembers Angle German suplexing him like 8 times in their Summerslam match. Austin covers and Angle JUST kicks out! They fight against the ropes and Angle hits a sneaky low blow. Angle Slam! Slightly slow cover and Austin just kicks out! Angle DEMANDS Austin get back up. Angle goes for a Stunner but Austin pushes free. Austin STUNNER! He covers and gets the pin to retain the title! Damn good stuff. Not on the level of their Summerslam match but still what you'd expect from these two. I can only imagine how great an Angle vs WCW era Austin match when he could still really wrestle could be. ***1/2

 

Cool down segment: Test pushes into Trish's locker room then virtually tries to force himself on her in a "walking the line toward sexual assault" way. He reminds Trish he can't be fired because he has IMMUNITY. Still? Trish doesn't care and rightly forces him out anyway. Creep. 

 

World Championship: Chris Jericho def The Rock (c) in 19:05- These two traded the WCW Title between them a couple of times during the Invasion and had built up a hugely personal feud, despite both being on the WWF side and both being faces, at least at the time. If tonight's crowd reactions are anything to go by you could probably officially say Rock's passed Austin as WWF unquestioned #1 star. Jericho's dyed the bottom part of his hair red, which will never not look weird to me. Not the red, the fact it's only on part. Lockup and Rock cranks a headlock. Nice extended speed run and Rock gets a couple of armdrags into an ARMBAR. Jericho does a flippy escape and works around into a headlock. Another speed run and this time Rock hits a clothesline. Jericho tries to escape but Rock pulls him back in. Another Rock clothesline. Spinning heel kick from Jericho and Rock goes out to the floor. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick and both guys trade shots around the usual ringside objects. Coming back in Jericho hits a flying back elbow off the top rope (after clearly signaling Rock "elbow" by patting his elbow) for 2. Suplex from Jericho and the old style ARROGANT COVER! No better indication than that Jericho's going back heel. Hebner doesn't even bother to count that. More speed and Rock hits a flying clothesline for 2. Back suplex from Jericho for 2. Clothesline for 2. They mistime a backdrop counter and Jericho kicks empty air. Rock sells it anyway. Kicked the air so hard the wind hit Rock. Snap belly to belly from Rock. Samoan drop for 2. Jericho hooks on a sleeper. Rock slowly goes down. Arm drops and Rock fights back up. Jericho cuts it off with a back elbow. He goes for the Lionsault, but sees Rock dodging and lands on his feet. Big right hands from Rock. Jericho counters with the misdirection bulldog. The Lionsault hits! Rock kicks out! Jericho is furious and has a little temper tantrum. Another confirmation he's a heel again. Snap suplex from Jericho and he goes up top. Rock catches him and gives him some chops while Jericho sits on the top rope. Jericho fights off a superplex attempt. Crossbody off the top, but Rock rolls through for a long 2 count. Jericho fires back with a clothesline and stomps. Rock dodges in the corner and Jericho FLIES over the top rope head first into the post! Jericho recovers quickly on the floor, dropping Rock on the barricade and slingshotting him into the post. Jericho then clears off the English announce table and drags Rock onto it. Rock fights off a Rock Bottom attempt on the table and DDTs Jericho through the table! Jericho grabs his head after impact in a way that looks like he caught it bad on something there. Jericho is extremely wobblelegged as Rock drags him up, but in a selling way, not truly loopy. Probably. Back in the ring Rock coils to finish it. Jericho fights the Rock Bottom off and hits a skull crushing finale. Senton from Jericho as he's clearly still trying to put himself together and still holding his head. Rock's in position, so Jericho decides to do his own People's Elbow. Rock grabs Jericho's legs and puts on the World's Shittiest Sharpshooter! Nice counter. Jericho counters that before it's fully on and puts on his own Sharpshooter. Even nicer counter. Rock tries to fight, slowly fades, then has one last push to the ropes. Jericho quickly goes for the Walls but Rock pulls him into a small package for 2. Rock Bottom! But Rock's too hurt and can't follow up. Oh great. Here comes Vince. Now Rock covers while Hebner's distracted. Rock punches Vince out. Spinebuster! Pad off. He goes for the People's Elbow, stops because Vince is on the apron and flips him back in, then finishes off hitting the Elbow on Jericho. But then Rock goes right for Vince again. Tactical error. Jericho low blows Rock and hits his own Rock Bottom! Cover and Jericho pins Rock with the Rock Bottom to win the title back! The overwhelming favorite to walk out Undisputed Champion is out. More Rock/Jericho goodness let down by the heavy distraction finish. ***3/4

 

As soon as the last match ends the glass shatters and Austin makes his way out for the main event, barely giving Jericho time to catch his breath. Austin's still limping from the ankle lock earlier.

 

Unification Match to Create the Undisputed WWF Championship: World Champion Chris Jericho def WWF Champion "Stone Cold" Steve Austin in 12:31- Jericho tries to hide in the ropes but Austin drags him out. Angle comes in and lays out Austin with a chair! Rock then comes in and plants Jericho with a Rock Bottom, then chases Angle off. Now the bell rings to officially start as we get our first look at the Undisputed Championship match graphic. Both guys are down and Hebner counts. The fans are chanting for Triple H, who WWF heavily teased possibly appearing on this show (as I mentioned he was on the poster) even though he wasn't ready yet. Jericho is up first and covers Austin for 2. Chops from Jericho. Running elbow to Austin and he does some ground and pound. Corner clothesline. Austin pops out of the corner with a spear! Not something you often saw from him. He pounds Jericho on the mat and gives him some buckle shots. He goes for a quick Stunner but Jericho escapes. Austin knocks him off the apron to the floor. Chops from Austin on the floor. Jericho gets run into the post. Austin pulls up the floor pad, exposing the floor. Jericho hits some shots and Austin bumps partially on the exposed floor while Jericho clears off the Spanish announce table. Fight on the table. Jericho blocks a Stunner and tries for the Walls on the table. Austin fights it and flips Jericho off back to the floor. He suplexes Jericho on the exposed part of the floor. Back in Jericho dodges in the corner and Austin goes shoulder first into the post. Jericho sees the target and runs it into the post again. Austin dodges a dropkick and slingshots Jericho into the corner. Clothesline from Austin for 2. Jericho uses that to counter into a Fujiwara armbar attempt. Not sure how well he's got it on. Jericho puts his feet on the ropes for additional leverage while Hebner desperately tries to make it look like he can't see. Finally he does and forces Jericho to break. Suplex from Jericho. Jericho tries coming off the top rope but Austin catches his coming down. More corner chops from Austin. He tries a backdrop, but Jericho rolls through it and hooks the Walls on! Austin slowly fights over and gets a rope break. Off a rope run Austin ducks and Jericho wipes out Hebner. The crowd starts chanting for Triple H again. Straight low blow from Jericho and he hits Austin with a Stunner. Vince is gesturing for someone to come out. It's former WCW and off and on crooked referee Nick Patrick, now a full fledged WWF referee. He straight up tells Jericho to cover Austin. Flair runs out, drags Patrick out of the ring and punches him out! Vince punches Flair and runs him into the post! Now Austin low blows Jericho. He sees Vince and immediately doesn't care about anything else but murdering Vince. Back to normal there. After getting back in Austin hits a Thesz press and elbow drop. Jericho tries for a missile dropkick. Austin dodges and puts Jericho into a Boston crab! Jericho's tapping but there's no ref. Now Booker T runs in! He's in street clothes and commentary specifically says he "doesn't work here anymore". He nails Austin the back of the head with the WWF Title belt and escapes back out through the crowd. Vince drags Hebner back in. Jericho covers, Hebner does the slow count, and Jericho gets the pin to win! The result no one, I mean NO ONE, expected. Jericho walks out the first ever Undisputed Champion. Forevermore it will be said that Jericho beat Rock and Austin in the same night to become the first Undisputed Champion. Never mind how he did it, which truly never gets mentioned. Jericho and Vince celebrate together as the show closes. The match is OK, but buried in crazy overbooking and even without that they never really hit high gear anyway, partially due to the overbooking and partially due to having already worked a match earlier. **1/2

 

On the surface Jericho was not an awful choice to win the title here as it should have finally gotten his career to the next level and cemented him as a permanent main eventer. The problem was the follow up, where Jericho was turned into the biggest weasel heel imaginable and was essentially a second fiddle joke of a champion to counter the massive face Triple H was after his return. Not to mention pairing Jericho up with his archnemesis Steph just because he was feuding with Trips.

 

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- The undercard is nothing special, but once they got to the mini title tournament the matches mostly delivered. You also have the historical importance of the first ever world title unification in WWF, even if it's in a weird spot on a very B PPV. Those matches are also let down some by the bevy of interference and how bad the follow up will be, at least as far as the champion is concerned. The last PPV of 2001 closes the book on what turned out to be a very transitional year for both WWF and wrestling as a whole, with everyone coming to grips with the new normal of WWF being the ONLY show in town. 2002 will turn out to be no less historically significant for WWF, with huge returns, the buildup to huge departures, massive debuts, the first ever roster split and even the entire company being forced to change its name.

OVERALL SHOW GRADE: C+