Royal Rumble '88

Legacy Review

Royal Rumble '88

January 24, 1988 from the Copps Coliseum in Hamilton, Ontario

Commentary: Vince McMahon and Jesse Ventura

The inaugural Rumble was not a PPV, but a special on the USA Network. This show represented another round in the scheduling moves and countermoves between WWF and the NWA/Crockett. The NWA was attempting to use its semi-successful annual Bunkhouse Stampede match as its first ever non-Starrcade PPV. WWF countered by putting their own spin on the classic battle royale format on basic cable at the same time.

Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat def "Ravishing" Rick Rude by DQ in 16:40- Heenan's not out with Rude, Rude doesn't do his prematch schtick, and he's wearing generic tights with no airbrushing. You'd hardly think it was Rude. Slugfest start. Steamboat skins the cat and backdrops Rude over the top and out. Rude wants a test of strength. Steamboat ZSJ's out and gets a DEEP armdrag. Well, deepish. For Steamboat that was only about a .7. Lots of arm work from Steamboat. There's a lady in the front row with a megaphone. There's something that would never get past security again. Well, the show is in Canada. Was there even any security at the entrance? Jimmy Hart needs to take her to kangaroo court for gimmick infringement. They turn it up a bit with a nice reversal sequence but Steamboat goes right back to the arm. Steamboat does some nice slides through Rude's legs, gets another .8 deep armdrag, and goes right back to the arm. Rude turns it around with an elbow to the face. He remembers to sell the arm when he's posing which is a nice touch. Rude dodges a dive and Steamboat flies outside. Rude rams his back on the edge of the ring (it's the hardest part), bodyslams him on the floor, and suplexes him back in. Long double chinlock (half a camel clutch) spot. Steamboat's arm clearly drops 3 times but Hebner goes for 4. Steamboat lifts Rude up into an electric chair to get out. That gets a "WHAT A MANEUVER!" from Vince. They baaaaaaaaarely pull off the bridge up spot. Steamboat starts hitting the quick covers WM 3 style. Steamboat goes for the crossbody off the top, but Rude pulls Hebner in the way and Hebner eats it. Rude gets Steamboat up in a torture rack like hold. Hebner gets up and calls for the bell. Rude's music plays and commentary says Steamboat submitted, but as Rude's leaving Fink announces Steamboat as the winner by DQ. Rude lets Hebner have it as we go to commercial. Rude was still inexperienced and Steamboat was starting to get disillusioned with his standing in WWF, but there was some decent back and forth in here and you could almost see the potential for something good. That potential would be reached in their WCW US title feud in '92. **

Mean Gene is out with Ventura. Dino Bravo is going to attempt to break the world record for the bench press, with Ventura "spotting". The record is 705 lbs. And Bravo is going to start at.....415. Smeg. It's a "warm up" lift. Bravo tries to get the crowd interested by demanding silence. We have to sit through Bravo gradually moving up 50 pounds per lift. It's a testament to how great Okerlund is that this segment doesn't completely fall to pieces. Finally after 15 minutes (I'm not joking, I wish I was) they make it to a record attempt at 715. Ventura helps Bravo lift the bar then denies doing it after. The only moderately decent thing that came out of this was Superstar Billy Graham going completely nuts on commentary at Summerslam '88 over how much of a sham this was. Who knew there were so many rules in weightlifting?

2 out of 3 Falls Match for the WWF Women's Tag Team Championship: The Jumping Bomb Angels def The Glamour Girls (c) (w/Jimmy Hart) in 15:21- Yes, you read that right. There was a WWF Women's Tag Championship before the modern version. The background story of it is pretty interesting. The NWA had both women's and women's tag titles dating back to the '50s (half of the first women's tag champs was, who else, Mae Young). In '83 when Fabulous Moolah signed with WWF she also had legal ownership of the NWA women's (she was champion) and women's tag titles. The reigning women's tag champs also signed with Vince, and Moolah sold him the NWA belts which were used to create the WWF version of the title. The Glamour Girls were the third team to hold the WWF tag titles, and had been champions over two and a half years. Jobber entrance for the champs, that's never a good sign. Everyone stalls in the ring while Vince bitches at Ventura for helping Bravo out earlier. But we get going quickly when the Angels ambush the Girls with dropkicks. Ventura asks Vince what the Angels' names are. Vince cares about as much as JR did when he was calling New Japan. Vince's excuse is "I don't speak Japanese". Well neither do I but I know how to pronounce names! It's easy when you get the hang of it. I apologize if I get the Angels backwards here, I'm working with the best info I can find since the original broadcast is no help. Yamazaki bridges out of a pin attempt. Tateno locks in a cobra twist. The Angels are working at 100 MPH. They're really damn good. Donnybrook. Stereo figure fours on the Girls. The Angels work Kai's leg for a bit. Kai manages to crawl away and Marella allows a clearly illegal tag as Martin's feet were on the bottom rope. Everything Ventura says about you is true, Marella. Tateno splats off the top rope and it looks like she hits the back of her head on the mat. Martin gets a spiffy flippy slam on Tateno for the first fall.
SECOND FALL: Tateno does another nice bridge out of a pin and dodges a dive to get a tag. Yamazaki gets 2 off a dive from the second rope. Vince has names! Or he thinks he does. I think he's saying their first names but I can't be sure. A Girls double team attempt fails. Martin tries for the flippy slam again but Tateno turns it into a sunset flip to get the 3! Great counter.
THIRD FALL: The Angels double team Kai. Tateno hits an enziguri. Yamazaki and Martin have a nice counter sequence. Kai hits a double underhook suplex for 2. Yamazaki sneaks away and gets the tag. After some selling Tateno says eff this and starts schooling Kai. A bodyslam/top rope kneedrop combo from the Angels gets 2. Tateno misses a senton off the top rope but quickly recovers. While Martin is bitching with the ref the Angels hit stereo missile dropkicks off the top rope to get the 3 and the titles! Huge pop from the crowd too, who probably had no clue who they were before tonight. Don't let anyone BS you into thinking workrate doesn't get over. The Angels were a tribute to joshi puroresu and way, way ahead of their time. They'd fit right in today. The Glamour Girls to their credit did their jobs as complementary pieces perfectly. The layout was great and they worked their asses off. The Glamour Girls would win the titles back in June in Japan before the belts were quietly retired in early '89. ***

Next up, Hogan and Andre are signing the contract for their rematch at next month's The Main Event. We get some highlight packages: Andre's near fall at the start of the WM 3 match that he and Heenan argued was a 3 count ever since, DiBiase trying to buy the title and Hogan refusing, and DiBiase making a deal with Andre for Andre to win the title and hand it over to DiBiase. DiBiase is out with Andre. Incidentally, this is the final major appearance of the pre-Winged Eagle WWF title belt that Hogan used for most of his first reign. President Tunney tries to get things moving. That's a wee little table they're using for this. Who gave them the kiddie table? Hogan sits down and signs, but Andre's in no rush. Andre casually leaning against the ropes with his hands in his pockets without a care in the world is super cool. He looks like a 450 pound Orange Cassidy. Finally Andre sits down and starts to slowly read the contract over. DiBiase promises he's put some sweeteners in there. "A contract is a contract is a contract, but only between Ferengi" (Rule of Acquisition #17). Andre finally signs. DiBiase tells him to give it the "stamp of approval". Andre smashes Hogan's face in the table and turns the table on him. Literally. DiBiase as Andre's mouthpiece/puppetmaster was a fantastic dynamic. And all the better because, for once, the heels' plan actually worked, thanks to a bit of twin magic in the match.

Royal Rumble- The first ever Rumble is a 20 man affair as that was the generally considered standard size for battle royales at the time. 2 minute intervals. Elimination is described as "over the top and it doesn't matter where your feet hit". We'll see how that holds up. The first two guys are already in the ring for introductions.
1 & 2. Bret "Hitman" Hart and WWF Tag Team Champion Tito Santana- They work a perfectly standard (but good, with these two) back and forth with no elimination attempts until right before #3 comes in. There's a countdown clock on screen but clearly not one in the arena.
3. "The Natural" Butch Reed- As Reed's coming in Santana nails Bret with the flying tamale. Reed goes straight for Santana and the heels double team him.
4. Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart- The draw is not working in Santana's favor. Neidhart runs in before the countdown and there's no way it's been 2 minutes. Small kinks, it's the first one. The heels triple team Santana into guacamole.
5. Jake "The Snake" Roberts- Massive pop. Roberts saves Santana and immediately throws Reed out. Roberts hooks Bret in for the DDT but Anvil saves him by absolutely murdering Roberts with a clothesline.
6. "King" Harley Race- Everyone breaks down across heel/face lines. 
7. "Jumping" Jim Brunzell- Anvil saves Bret again. Roberts pulls Anvil's beard!
8. Sam Houston- The Harts eliminate Santana.
9. "Dangerous" Danny Davis- He goes right for Houston, the only guy in the match smaller than he is. Race does a seesaw spot in the ropes. Davis picks a fight with Roberts and doesn't like what he gets.
10. Boris Zhukov- Goes right for capitalist pig Texan Houston. Race and Zhukov have the first heel/heel faceoff but it doesn't last long.
11. "The Rock" Don Muraco- But wait! Muraco AND Nikolai Volkoff come out. The refs keep Volkoff from getting in. Roberts and Brunzell eliminate Zhukov while Vokoff looks on helpless. I'm not sure if that was planned or Volkoff just got confused.
12. Nikolai Volkoff- The refs let him in. Muraco eliminates Race, but Race argues with the refs and refuses to leave.
13. "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan- Another pretty big pop. Duggan and Race say hi to each other with fists on Duggan's way in.
14. "Outlaw" Ron Bass- Volkoff eliminates Brunzell. Muraco gets a .5 Flair Flip in.
15. B. Brian Blair- Roberts is by far the most over guy in this match. Every time he does anything there's DDT chants.
16. Hillbilly Jim- Anvil goes right for him. Jim dodges and eliminates Anvil. Blair goes over the top but lands on the apron. So much for that "no matter where the feet hit" thing.
17. Dino Bravo- Houston climbs up the ropes and for some reason gets on Bass' shoulders. Bass thanks his stupidity and dumps him over the top and out. What the hell was that?
18. The Ultimate Warrior- Almost zero crowd reaction. Warrior was still a work in progress in just about every respect. And for some reason he's in Hogan red and yellow. Muraco eliminates Bret.
19. The One Man Gang- It's amazing how these big guys always end up coming in late. It's like the drawing's rigged or something. Nah. OMG eliminates both Blair and Roberts.
20. The Junkyard Dog- Duggan eliminates Volkoff FOR AMERICA. OMG eliminates Jim. A 3 point stance charge from Duggan takes out Davis. OMG and Bravo eliminate Warrior to zero reaction. Bass eliminates JYD. Bass eliminates himself while Muraco belatedly tries to make it look like he's clotheslining him over.
Final Four: Muraco, Duggan, Bravo and OMG. OMG squashes Duggan in the corner. Muraco plays dodge the heels for a bit. Frenchie gets on the apron and Muraco dropkicks him. Bravo holds Muraco and OMG clotheslines him out. The heels corner Duggan so Duggan tries to strike first. It works for a bit but the heels are too much. They set up to take Duggan out the same way as Muraco earlier, but Duggan dodges and OMG eliminates Bravo instead. Duggan and OMG renew their longstanding rivalry from Mid-South/UWF. After some OMG pummeling Duggan does the now classic, oft repeated Rumble ending spot where OMG charges and Duggan pulls down the top rope on him. OMG dumps outside and Hacksaw Jim Duggan is your first ever Royal Rumble winner.

There wasn't a whole lot going here in terms of star power, as the match was filled with lower midcarders and tag teams, but it was clear they were on to something with the format. With a bit of spit and polish, a move to PPV, expanding to 30 guys and making sure the big names were all involved, the Rumble would quickly become the most popular gimmick match of all time and one of the most anticipated dates on the wrestling calendar every year. 30 years on, it's still as popular as ever. **3/4

Hogan promo time. He's so pissed he rips his shirt off.

2 out of 3 Falls Match: The Islanders (w/Bobby Heenan) def The Young Stallions in 14:00- Tama and Powers start. Tama hides in the ropes before Powers gets within 5 feet of him, then offers the insincere handshake. Tama's attitude is not unlike another Tama that's wrestling in Japan today. With fewer crotch grabs. It's a PG era. Vince somehow says what we were all thinking and says the bench press segment was boring. Roma and Haku trade arm wringers. They botch a hip toss spot. Powers goes mild FIP before a double clothesline leads to double tags. Roma's a house on fire and Tama begs off. The Islanders double team to send Roma flying over the top and out to the floor, hurting his knee. Roma's counted out.
SECOND FALL: No, wait. The Stallions are in the back with Roma "getting medial treatment" on his knee, so the DiBiase/Andre promo to respond to Hogan is shoehorned in. DiBiase promises victory. Andre claims he's still undefeated and gives the low rent 10 year old Sean Mooney clone a shot in the stomach for interrupting.
SECOND FALL FOR REAL: Roma's knee is taped up but he's a wrestler, dammit. Roma has to start the fall because he was the legal man at the end of the last fall. Tama goes for the knee like a lion on fresh meat. Roma manages to get his knees up on a dive and tags Powers in. Powers gets some near falls in before Haku has enough and gives him a stiff shot right in the gut. Powers goes FIP with the added story of Roma being hurt and useless. Roma tries to tag in anyway and eventually manages to. Haku dismantles the knee. Tama hits a big splash on the knee of the top rope, then gets Roma to submit to a single leg crab. A 2-0 victory in a best of 3 falls match is pretty much a squash. The Islanders looked good, but the match flow was completely killed by the delay and promo spot. They would have been much better off running two short matches instead of this. 3/4*

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS: With the combination of mid-level matches and non-wrestling segments this felt a lot like an extended Saturday Night's Main Event episode with only the B crew present. Still, it gets the job done. The first Rumble is of course historic but also a fine watch, and it's also nice to see some quality joshi wrestling decades before it caught on in the US.
OVERALL SHOW GRADE: C

Starrcade '87

Legacy Review

Starrcade '87

November 26, 1987 from the UIC Pavilion in Chicago

Commentary: Jim Ross and Tony Schiavone

This year's tagline is "Chi-Town Heat". This is very much a transition show between the Jim Crockett Promotions/Mid-Atlantic Wrestling territory days and the future WCW. Over the past few years to try to compete with the rising national presence of the WWF Crockett had bought out most of the major territories in the south, most notably the Florida, Georgia and Kansas City territories (though Jerry Lawler's kingdom in Memphis would remain an independent holdout), and in April of '87 made the biggest purchase yet: Bill Watts' UWF, formerly known as Mid-South. They were based in Louisiana and ran regular shows at the Silverdome Superdome. Watts had changed the company's name to UWF with the intention of going national, only to end up being in over his head and having to bail out and sell. Not unlike what would happen to Crockett less than a year later. Lots of guys were brought in from the new acquisition, and Crockett even ran a bit of a NWA vs UWF invasion angle that was eerily similar to the future WWF/WCW invasion, in that the bought property was often mistreated and ultimately buried. One of the biggest new faces that stuck was Jim Ross, making his Starrcade debut here. This would also be the first Starrcade available on PPV as opposed to just closed circuit TV. It also had the first shots fired in the tit for tat that Crockett/WCW and WWF would have over PPV scheduling the next few years, as Vince put up the first Survivor Series at the same time as this show, and even went so far to threaten cable providers (that back in those days only had one PPV channel available) that if they offered Starrcade over Survivor Series they would not have the option to broadcast Wrestlemania 4. Needless to say, it was a very interesting time in the wrestling business.

"Hot Stuff" Eddie Gilbert, Larry Zbyszko & Rick Steiner (w/Baby Doll) and Michael Hayes, Jimmy Garvin & Sting (w/Precious) go to a 15:00 time limit draw- Gilbert, Steiner, Hayes and Sting were all UWF purchases, while Zbyszko was returning to the NWA after a very successful run in the AWA. Sting had held the UWF tag titles with both Gilbert and Steiner but both turned on him. Sting was scheduled to win the UWF TV title just before the buyout, but Crockett and head booker Dusty Rhodes knew they finally had the guy that could possibly fill the top young babyface slot that had been empty since Magnum TA's injury and wanted to bring him along slowly. Hayes and Garvin had been teaming for a few weeks but hadn't officially branded themselves as the new version of the Fabulous Freebirds just yet. Badstreet USA is still awesome entrance music. Ring Gearhead note: Rick Steiner is not wearing his headgear yet, but he does have mismatched boots. Lots of empty seats opposite hard camera. It looks like a WWE PPV preshow. JR claims they're "jam packed". It would fill out later in the show. Steiner lays Sting out to start, but Sting dodges a dive and Steiner falls to the floor, which again in these days was straight concrete. No mats. Sting dives outside onto him over the cameraman, then throws him back in and hits a dropkick off the top rope! Donnybrook! The faces clear the ring. There's no doubt Sting looks like a star waiting to happen. Zbyszko comes in to nuclear heat. The AWA was based in Minnesota so geographically he's worked the closer territory and was probably more known to the Chicago crowd. The faces work over all the heels for a bit, until Steiner muscles Garvin back into the heel corner. Garvin goes face in peril. The heels keep him isolated with surprisingly no cheating. At the 10 minute call Garvin gets a tag to Sting. Sting cleans house until Zbyszko pokes his eyes (and says "WHAT?" to the ref's admonishment). Sting's thrown over the top and out, and goes FIP. At the 2 minutes left call Sting gets a tag to Hayes. DONNYBROOKING ALL OVER! Hayes bulldogs Zbyszko but only gets 2. Then he locks a sleeper in, but while the ref's distracted Gilbert hits him from behind off the top rope. Steiner locks in a bear hug then turns it into his soon to be patented belly to belly, but only for 2. Hayes tries a desperation small package but gets 2. Then he tries a sunset flip, but the bell rings for the time limit. Minus the lack of a finish this was perfectly acceptable. Everyone was working hard. **3/4

UWF Heavyweight Championship: "Dr. Death" Steve Williams (c) def NWA Western States Heritage Champion Barry Windham in 6:50- Williams was a fantastic wrestler that always seemed destined for the upper echelon but never held a singles world title in North America. He was also a big star in Japan, working mostly with All Japan, where he did win the Triple Crown Championship. He's also JR's quiet favorite as he was also a proud OU alum, even wearing a Sooners jersey to the ring. The Western States Heritage title was a completely pointless title Crockett started right after the UWF buyout. It lasted less than two years and was only held by two guys. Code of Honor handshake to start as both guys are faces. Williams busts out the power moves early. Windham tries a roll up. Good mat wrestling sequence. The crowd doesn't care. It starts bogging down as every time someone hits a move they stop and reset, killing any momentum. The Chicago crowd is getting seriously restless. If this was in the modern era there'd be a big CM Punk chant going on. Windham accidentally headbutts Williams right in the crotch on a leapfrog. That wakes the crowd up, until Windham gives him plenty, and I mean *plenty* of time to recover. The crowd is having none if it. For 1987, this is a crowd rebellion. When they finally get going again instead of cranking it up they go right to the basic mat wrestling again. Williams dodges a dive and Windham goes over the top and out. Williams is still selling the nut shot. As Windham comes in Williams uses an amateur cradle to get the pin. Bleh. This had tons of potential and started promising, but quickly fell off a cliff. The crowd shit all over it something fierce, which was probably some of the cause of less than max effort. This reminded me a bit, accounting for differences of era, of the famous Lesnar/Goldberg crowd rebellion match at Wrestlemania 20. Despite being on the Starrcade card the UWF title would be quietly euthanized before the end of the year. 3/4*

Scaffold Match: The Rock 'N' Roll Express def NWA United States Tag Team Champions The Midnight Express (w/Big Bubba Rogers and Jim Cornette) in 10:23- The only RNR/Midnights match at a Starrcade, and it's a scaffold match. RNR only get a mild pop. We're definitely not in the south. Even walking southern heat machine Jim Cornette only gets middling heat. Rogers attacks Morton before he can climb up, isolating Gibson up top. The Midnights attack and bust him open. Rogers tries to climb up, but Morton steals Cornette's racket and gives him a shot. Morton brings the racket up top with him and unloads on the heels with it. Eaton gives Morton a face full of powder. Gibson fights off a double team. Eaton teases falling off after another racket shot. Eaton gets the racket, but Morton counters by pulling off a pipe from the railing and using it as a weapon. This structure is definitely not up to OSHAA specs. Who built this thing? Glory's army of brain sucked crazy people? The racket falls to the ground, but Cornette shows off a pretty good arm by tossing it back up. Lane and Morton gradually work their way underneath the scaffold and Lane falls down. The RNR then work Eaton underneath and he also takes the plunge to end the match. Afterward Rogers goes up. Morton distracts him and hits a low blow to allow the RNR to escape. It's not as "good" as last year's scaffold match. There's definitely diminishing returns in this spectacle. And it's even worse when you know they could have given these teams 15-20 minutes in a regular match and you would have gotten 4 stars minimum. *

Bob Caudle is in the back to kill time while the scaffold is taken down. The not quite yet Freebirds lay down a challenge for the world tag title match winners.

Unification Match for the UWF and NWA World Television Championships: Nikita Koloff (NWA) def Terry Taylor (UWF, w/Eddie Gilbert) in 18:58- Taylor had a cup of coffee with Crockett in the past, including working Starrcade '85, but was seen as a UWF import. Koloff was still riding the babyface push that started when he replaced Magnum TA in the Starrcade '86 main event. The crowd doesn't sound particularly interested in either guy. There is a small, kid driven Nikita chant. Cautious start, and some shoving. Koloff no sells an arm drag and Taylor jumps back like he just got shocked. Lots of rope break gamesmanship. Koloff no sells a wristlock and reverses it. Taylor goes all the way to the apron to try to get out, but Koloff drags him back in over the top rope by the wrist. Koloff no sells a headbutt. Lots and lots of arm work on Taylor. Lots. Koloff no sells some punches and hits a backdrop. Taylor powders and tries to stall but Koloff drags him back in by the hair. Taylor gets a knee up on a charge and Koloff finally sells something for about two seconds. And back to the arm. Taylor dodges a Sickle attempt. They both go outside and Taylor gives Koloff a barricade shot, then posts Koloff's shoulder. Gilbert also gets a shot in on the shoulder. A Taylor inverted atomic drop gets two. Koloff tries a roll up for 2. Gilbert hits Koloff in the knee with a chair and Taylor locks in the figure 4. Hebner breaks it up when he sees Gilbert assisting. Koloff dodges a charge while Gilbert is on the apron, Taylor and Gibson collide, and Koloff hits the Sickle to win. It took forever to get out of first gear. Koloff on offense was 10 minutes that felt like an hour. Once Ric Flair lite Taylor took control it got pretty good. Split the difference and call it **1/4. Taylor saw the writing on the wall for most of the UWF guys and left almost immediately after this show, making a quick stop in WCCW before heading up to the WWF, where Vince did unspeakable things to him.

NWA World Tag Team Championship: Arn Anderson and Tully Blanchard (w/JJ Dillon ) (c) def The Road Warriors (w/Paul Ellering) by DQ in 13:27- Unsurprising hometown pop for Chicago's favorite wrestling sons pre-CM Punk. Arn and Hawk start. Arn goes to the top rope but Hawk grabs him and, instead of straight slamming him, gorilla presses him. The heels stop to confer. Plan A, out the window. Arn is selling like a madman for Hawk. He tries to bail again but walks into Ellering. The managers stand off outside. Tully charges Hawk, Hawk puts a boot up, Tully notices and stops, so Hawk clotheslines him instead. He takes a powder, but Animal press slams him back in. Tully tries to go off the top but Animal catches him and twists into a powerslam in one seamless move. The Roadies' power game is just too much. Arn and Tully confer in the corner. Plan B is ditched, go for Plan C. They try to blatantly double team but Hawk kills them with a double clothesline. So much for Plan C. Tully tries to chop Animal but loses that exchange as well. Hawk goes to press slam Tully again, but Arn sneaks in and clips his knee. Plan D. Or E? Knew we'd get one that worked eventually, Arn and Tully are too smart. Arn posts the knee and Tully gives it a chair shot. Arn tries for a figure four but Hawk pushes him into the corner. Arn still manages to prevent a tag. Tully is successful with the figure four but doesn't hold it for long. Hawk powers out of pin attempts and crotches Arn. Hot tag! Tully trips Animal from outside to kill the momentum. Tully deliberately knocks Tommy Young out of the ring. Arn charges Animal but Animal ducks and backdrops Arn over the top and out. Double clothesline to Tully. Doomsday Device on Arn! Backup ref Earl Hebner runs in and counts the 3! The Road Warriors win the title! Or, do they? Yup, here comes the Dusty Finish. Young comes in and raises Arn's hand. The Roadies have been DQ'd for throwing Arn over the top. Hawk and Animal refuse to give the belts back and leave with them. Big "bullshit" chant. Overthinking your booking and trying to be too clever by half is not a recent nor solely Vince McMahon problem in wrestling. Sometimes the easiest or obvious path is the correct one, as it should have been here. Somehow it would be almost another year before the Road Warriors finally won the titles for real. The match itself was really damn good before the screwy finish. ***1/2

Steel Cage Match for the NWA United States Championship: "The American Dream" Dusty Rhodes def "The Total Package" Lex Luger (c) (w/JJ Dillon) in 16:28- If Dusty loses he'll be suspended for 90 days, which is somehow billed as "career threatening". After spending his rookie year in Florida learning the ropes, Luger came into Crockett in mid-'87 with a small warp core strapped to his back. He was immediately paired with the Four Horsemen, first as an "associate", then a full member after Ole Anderson was kicked out/retired from wrestling. He defeated Nikita Koloff for the US title in July. Johnny Weaver has been tasked with protecting the key to the cage after the door is locked. Remember, the NWA didn't do escape rules cage matches like WWF did. Weaver also bequeathed his version of the sleeper, the Weaverlock, to Dusty for this match. Luger tries to run Dusty into the cage right away. Dusty blocks it and gives him a Bionic Elbow, which Luger completely no sells. Luger flexes. Dusty struts and tongue in cheek flexes. Dusty with quick punches and another elbow. Luger sells this one. Early sleeper attempt but Luger gets in the ropes. Dusty works the arm for a while. Luger comes back and Dusty takes the first cage shot. Cheese grater! Dusty's busted open. Dusty hits the world's ugliest dropkick but Luger shrugs it off. Luger calls for the Rack but he can't get Dusty's......girth all the way locked in and Dusty grabs the cage to get out. More arm work. Dusty tries to use the power of the crowd to hulk up, but Luger goes deeper and deeper into the heel playbook to keep him down. After a bit Dusty decides enough is enough and starts no selling and attacking. A DDT gets 2. Sleeper! Dusty piggybacks on Luger's back to really lock it in. Outside, Dillon takes Weaver out and steals the key, but suddenly realizes he's forgotten how locks work and throws Weaver's chair into the ring instead. But it backfires, as Dusty gets to it first and gives Luger a DDT onto the chair to get the 3! Dusty wins the only of the 3 major NWA singles titles he hasn't won before. Dillon falls to 0 for about 800 against Dusty. Luger's still raw, but it's enjoyable. ***

Main Event Feud Recap- Heading into this year's Starrcade, Ric Flair told the NWA that he was tired of defending the title every year and wanted to win it again at the big show. The NWA agreed. Crockett knew about the scheduling of Survivor Series and hoped that Flair winning the title back would be a big moment that could compete with whatever WWF put up. What they couldn't agree on was who should be the champion in the interim. With a lack of consensus and no clear big name to coalesce around they reached a compromise choice: Ron Garvin. Now don't get me wrong, Garvin was a perfectly fine wrestler. But he was not a guy that screamed "world champion", especially in a day when very few guys got to that level. Lacking other options they rolled with it, and Garvin upset Flair for the title at a TV taping in Detroit in September.

No Time Limit, No DQ Steel Cage Match for the NWA World Heavyweight Championship: "Nature Boy" Ric Flair (w/JJ Dillon) def Ronnie Garvin (c) in 17:38- There's a small Garvin contingent in the crowd, but it's mostly pro-Flair. Ring Gearhead note: Flair is in his very rare white trunks and boots tonight. Flair taunts Garvin with a WOOOOOOOO on a rope break. Chop off! There's a large "Garvin sucks" chant. Another corner of the arena tries a "Ric Flair sucks" chant but it goes nowhere. Garvin launches Flair on a huge backdrop. Flair begs off. Garvin Stomp! Another chop exchange. Flair gets desperate and nails Garvin with a low blow. Hey, it's no DQ. After rolling through some of his basics Flair starts working the knee. He does a nice seamless transition from a kneebreaker straight into the figure four. Flair is finally the first guy to try a cage shot, but Garvin blocks it, dodges a charge and Flair eats cage instead. A cheese grater spot later, and Flair is bleeding. Flair tries to climb the cage but Garvin follows and rams his head into the top of the cage. Flair falls to the mat, gets back up, and Flair Flops. More hard chops from Garvin. Flair counters with an elbow, goes up to the top rope and, well, we know how well that usually works out for him. Garvin hooks in his own figure four. Yes more choppiness, and it hasn't gotten old. Garvin blocks another cage shot attempt and Flair eats another one. A Garvin crossbody off the top rope gets 2. They both climb up again, and it ends with Flair getting crotched on the top rope. Garvin goes for a sunset flip off the top rope, which is the move he won the title with, but Flair reverses it into a pin attempt of his own and grabs the top rope for leverage. Tommy Young catches him and kicks him off. Garvin reverses the reversal but only gets 2. Flair backs Garvin into Young. Garvin gets the Hand of Stone KO punch, but the delay from Young having to recover gives Flair enough time to kick out at 2. Garvin tries a Thez Press, but Flair catches him, uses the momentum to drop Garvin's head right onto the pole in the middle of the cage, and drops on top of him for the 3! It's blindingly obvious that Garvin, for all his talent, was not on Flair's level or main event material. But if you're going to look good, get in the ring with the greatest of all time right in the middle of his peak years. ***3/4

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- It's very much an "OK" show. Better than '84 or '86, but not nearly as good as '83 or '85. The Chicago crowd was hot and very smarky for the time. This would be the last Starrcade on Thanksgiving, as the competition from Survivor Series would force it to be moved to late December starting in 1988. This would also be the last Starrcade under the Jim Crockett Promotions banner, as the national expansion would continue to find trouble and they would ultimately sell to Ted Turner in November '88.
OVERALL SHOW GRADE: Is there a grade between B- and C+? That'd be this one