Royal Rumble '99

Legacy Review

Royal Rumble '99

January 24, 1999 from The Pond in Anaheim, CA

Commentary: Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler

The tagline for this show is "No Chance in Hell", because Vince told Austin he has no chance in hell at ever being WWF Champion again. The theme song for the show is the same No Chance in Hell that would later become Vince's theme. In keeping with the usual Corporate shenanigans of the time, Vince and co. screwed Austin over by making sure that Austin "drew" the #1 spot in the Rumble. Then to stack the deck even further, Vincent K. McMahon himself decided to enter the match. At first he tried to slot himself in at #30, but Commissioner Shawn Michaels forced him to be #2 instead. If that weren't enough, Vince has also put up a $100,000 bounty for whoever eliminates Austin from the Rumble.

The Big Boss Man def WWF Hardcore Champion Road Dogg in 11:52- The New Age Outlaws and the Corporation team of Boss Man and Ken Shamrock have been butting heads for a while. First Shamrock and Boss Man won the tag titles from the NAO, titles they still have for this show, then Road Dogg took the Hardcore title from Boss Man. The Outlaws haven't split up, but they're going into the phase where they're both pursuing singles opportunities, or to put it another way Billy Gunn's failed singles push is getting underway. Boss Man wants to hit the ropes a few times after the bell. Apparently he didn't warm up before the match. Dogg gives him a crotch chop in response. Lockup and Boss Man immediately shoves Dogg out. They stall for a minute to let a "Boss Man sucks" chant go. Dogg ducks a shot, hits a punch and dances. Boss Man gets some corner shots followed by an avalanche. Boss Man shouts "Where's it at, biatch?" and gives Dogg a mocking crotch chop. Dogg dodges another avalanche, bounces Boss Man's crotch on the top rope and hits mounted punches. After a blocked inverted atomic drop and dropkick Boss Man is pissed. He grabs his nightstick and Dogg bails. He drags Boss Man down and crotches him on the post. A Boss Man back elbow sends Dogg tumbling back out to the floor. Another corner beatdown by Boss Man, followed by a big boot. He slaps on a bear hug because this match sure needed to breathe some more. Dogg bites out. Yet more corner beatdown from Boss Man. He goes to take a top turnbuckle pad off that doesn't come into play again the rest of the match. Spinebuster for 2. Dogg tries to hulk up off punches but Boss Man gets him down again. Dogg ducks and slaps on a sleeper. Boss Man eye rakes out and hits a backbreaker. He goes up top but Dogg slams him back down. Slugfest. Dogg gets his dancing jabs in. Flying forearm and kneedrop for 2. Dogg comes off the ropes but runs into the Boss Man Slam! That gets the pin. *1/4

 

WWF Intercontinental Championship: Ken Shamrock (c) def "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn in 14:23- Yup, Shamrock's a double champion. To go along with his singles push Gunn is in the slow transformation from Bad Ass to Mr. Ass. I regret to inform you Shamrock's (kayfabe fake) sister has arrived. Gunn mooned her on Raw to set this up, with her selling it brilliantly by....laughing like she had no idea what was going on. Val Venus is also involved because she's a woman and there wasn't a woman in WWF he wasn't trying to bone. It's Russo. Funny side story, according to rumor Shamrock (who was married) and the woman playing his sister really did get intimate with each other almost immediately after she arrived. There's a setup for a porno. ANYWAY, Shamrock charges down the aisle and the fight is on. Gunn hits a flying clothesline and both guys exchange some ground and pound stuff. Shamrock hits kicks in the corner and a clothesline. Gunn responds with his own sloppy clothesline. Then Gunn slaps on a very early chinlock. Not a great sign. Delayed suplex from Gunn for 2. Shamrock dodges and Gunn posts his shoulder. Big kneelift from Shamrock, followed by chest kicks that Cole says "What a kick to the face!" for. Bit off there, Cole. Standing spinning heel kick from Shamrock for 2. Gunn counters a backdrop attempt with a fameasser. Still not his finisher. Gunn then copies Road Dogg with mounted punches. Shamrock low bridges Gunn to the floor. He gives Gunn knees against the barricade, then proceeds to slowly smack him against almost every available surface around the ring. Gunn pushes Shamrock off the apron into the Spanish announce table, which sadly does not collapse. Didn't even get a Savinovich bump out of it, and that man will sell anything. Back in Shamrock does a weird roll kick into Gunn's leg that almost looks like an accident. The hurt shoulder from earlier completely forgotten, Shamrock now targets the leg he hurt earlier in the build to set the ankle lock up. And then Shamrock puts on a front facelock for frak's sake. No idea why. Guess I'll blame Russo for that too. Gunn counters a knee to the gut into a roll up for 2. Shamrock hits a perfectplex for 2, then gets back on the bad leg. After some dodges ref Tim White takes a clothesline and goes down. Double clothesline and literally everyone in the ring is down. Here comes Val Venus. He plants Shamrock with a DDT. Gunn slooooooooooooooooooooooooowly crawls over, and White recovers to count. Shamrock kicks out! The crowd bit hard on that at least. Gunn strings some offense together to get rolling and goes up top. Shamrock dodges and Gunn lands on his hurt leg, hurting it even more. The ankle lock is on, Gunn taps and it's over. Dipping into the rumor mill again, apparently Gunn was supposed to win the title here to get his big singles push going, but arrived late to the arena and was re-booked to lose as punishment. Not the best start. The DX guys outside Trips and maybe Chyna were starting to get almost as unmanageable as Shawn Michaels was in earlier years at this point. The match was dull as hell. *1/2

 

WWF European Championship: X-Pac (c) def Gangrel in 5:53- Who's that bald headed bastard with a familiar face reffing this match? Why that's Teddy Long playa! Long had just signed with WWF to go back to his original WCW roots as a referee, and made his TV debut a few weeks prior on Raw. Basic start and Pac hits an armdrag. Another speed run and Pac spins into a side suplex, then follows up with a legdrop for 2. Huge corner kicks from Pac. Gangrel dodges in the corner and Pac crashes. Double underarm suplex from Gangrel. He drops Pac on the top rope with Pac doing a crazy almost 360 sell. Pac gets flopped down face first for 2. Gangrel goes up top for an elbow but Pac dodges. Spinning heel kick. Flying clothesline for 2. Another spinning heel kick. And for the 3rd straight match a DX member does basic, no frills mounted punches. The bronco buster hits. A THIRD spinning heel kick from Pac. Not a lot of effort has been put forth by any of the DX guys tonight, to my point at the end of the previous match. Pac goes up top and Gangrel crotches him. After a top rope fight Pac hits a crossbody, but Ganrel rolls through it. Long counts 3, but that wasn't supposed to be the finish so he keeps going like nothing happened. There's a small but noticeable "You fucked up" chant from a part of the crowd. In his defense he's been out of the reffing game for a while, but that was ugly. He could have at least waived it off harder, gone over and had a conversation with Fink or something. Powerslam from Gangrel for 2. He lifts Pac up, but Pac turns it into the X-Factor! That gets the pin. It's a Raw match, but they kept things moving a bit better than the last two. **

 

Strap Match for the WWF Women's Championship: Sable (c) def Luna Vachon in 4:43- I suspect this won't be saving the show. Just a hunch. Before the match Shane McMahon comes out. He'd been having a beef with Sable that would be completely forgotten about in a few weeks. Don't ask, it's Russo. Shane introduces Luna, then says Sable can't wrestle tonight due to a "chronic back injury" (attack by Luna on the Sunday Night Heat preshow). He calls Sable out to forfeit the title to Luna. Sable comes out holding her back, gets in the ring, takes the mic from Shane, and says "Ring the bell". A nonplussed Shane says "Have it your way" and leaves to join commentary. In a rarity for WWF this is traditional touch all four corners strap match rules. Sable gets quick straps whips in and pulls Luna into the post. Jeez, Luna's thong is.....no. No no no. No one wants or needs to see that. It's all typical strap match stuff. Lots of whipping and choking with both of them getting a couple of corners before being stopped. Luna does some token work on Sable's hurt back but nothing's really done with it. Sable still looks green as hell. In the end they do the usual strap match ending where Luna and Sable both touch three corners. After that they fight for leverage in the middle of the ring, where any sane referee would have said all momentum is lost and they need to start over. Shane gets up on the apron. While he's providing a convenient distraction a "fan" who'd been stalking Sable for weeks (Tori) hops the barricade and punches out Luna. Sable touches corner number four and gets the win. Nope, that did not save the show. DUD

 

I Quit Match for the WWF Championship: The Rock def Mankind (c) 21:47- The whole setup here is Mankind goaded Rock into a match he can't possibly win, because Mick Foley would never ever ever say "I quit" after everything he's been through in his career. The video package has some footage from Foley and Terry Funk's legendary deathmatches in Japan which is a nice touch. Rock tries to jump before the bell but Mankind is ready for him. He pounds Rock down in the corner and hits the running knee. Mankind takes the mic from Hebner but can't get it to work. After some back and forth Mankind hits the misdirection bulldog. Now the mic is working. "The Rock says you can kiss his ass". Mankind hits him with the mic! "The Rock is gonna kick your fat ass". Cactus Clothesline! Rock reverses a whip on the floor and Mankind goes HARD into the steps. Rock takes Cole's headset to provide his own beating narration. Before he gets very far Mankind clotheslines him from behind and Rock's draped over the announce table. Chairshot from Mankind. Back in Rock refuses to quit again so Mankind gives him more mic shots. Double underhook DDT! Socko is out and the Mandible Claw is on! Rock fades and goes out! Hebner tries to ask Rock if he quits, but Rock is completely unconscious and can't speak. Mankind takes the mic and says "I'm gonna split open that ridiculous eyebrow". They go back to the floor and into the crowd. Mankind tries a Cactus Clothesline over the barricade but Rock counters and flips Mankind onto the floor. Rock takes the bell, and bell hammer, and rings the bell on Mankind's head! With a little singing. They get up on the Spanish announce table. Rock sets up for a Rock Bottom. The table collapses! Oops. Neither guy's fault there, that was just table failure. Rock quickly checks on Foley to see if he's good, then gets the mic. "Up yours, Rock!". A water spit from Rock sets Mankind off. Running clothesline in the aisle. They work up to the stage area. Mankind gets run into a tech table. Rock hits a DDT on the floor! No quit from Mankind. Rock soaks in the crowd a bit, some of whom are legitimately chanting for him, then goes away to get.....a ladder! He tries to run Mankind over with the ladder but Mankind wins that collision. Mankind goes for a running elbow into the ladder but Rock gets out of the way and all Mankind gets is ladder. Rock sets the ladder up and climbs up into the first level of the arena. Mankind follows and they fight right on the edge. Rock teases falling. He low blows Mankind! Rock hops the rail, goes up the steps a bit for a head of steam, charges and knocks Mankind off! Mankind falls down into a stack of electrical equipment! Sparks explode out of the boxes like a Starfleet control panel during an attack (seriously, did Starfleet never hear of fuses). The arena lights even go out for a minute to sell it all. Shane comes out and tries to get Rock to stop, he's gone far enough. Rock thinks he hasn't gone nearly adequately far. Mankind starts to crawl away. Rock doesn't even ask him to quit, he just continues the beating. They get back to the ring. Mankind is bleeding a bit. Rock gets a pair of handcuffs and cuffs Mankind's hands behind his back. The beating really continues. Buckle shots from Rock. Mankind with a low blow! He kicks at Rock because that's all he can do. Rock goes down and Mankind bites him! Knee to the Corporate Jewels! Rock comes off the ropes with a clothesline. He goes out, gets a chair, and sets it on Mankind's face. Pad off. Corporate Elbow onto the chair! Rock gets the mic. "Go to hell, Rock". "Well if the Rock is going to hell, you go first!". Rock takes the chair and starts pummeling Mankind with chairshots to the head. Another ask. Mankind says "You'll have to kill me". Rock obliges with more chairshots to the head. Mankind wants more! Commentary is begging for Rock to stop as they work up the aisle with the chairshots continuing. Even Lawler. Rock hits a straight chairshot to the back of Mankind's head and it's getting seriously uncomfortable to watch even for me. Rock gets the mic and says he guarandamnteed that he would make Mankind quit. Now, what do you say? He puts the mic to Mankind's mouth but he's almost face down on the aisle with his hair covering his face so we can't see anything. After a moment Mankind saying "I QUIT! I QUIT!" comes over the speakers. It's pretty obvious what's going on but that's good enough for Hebner. Rock wins and take back the WWF Title, his second. Mankind "quitting" was, of course, an earlier promo being played over the speakers by the Corporation. After some in-ring celebrating Rock poses over Mankind's carcass. A stretcher comes out, but as usual Foley insists on walking out under his own power. One or two small hiccups aside this was a fantastic match, one of the most famous WWF/E I Quit matches ever, one of the most well known Rumble WWF Title matches ever, and the pinnacle of the Foley/Rock feud that polished Rock into a legitimate main event player. ****

 

Royal Rumble- 90 second intervals tonight, which is close to becoming the yearly standard. The prematch video package focuses on all the ways Vince has screwed Austin out of the title the past few months, starting with the Kane/Taker double pin at Breakdown in September. I don't think it could be more clear going in that this Rumble is Austin, Vince and 28 other guys that don't matter. It's never mentioned on TV because it's not story relevant and sports-like stats were the last thing Russo cared about, but Austin is also going for his third straight Rumble win, which would be both a consecutive and all time record.

1 & 2. "Stone Cold" Steve Austin and Mr. McMahon- No music for Vince on his entrance. He's not wearing a shirt and ever sucking up to the boss Lawler freaks out over how jacked he is. The bell rings and Austin slugs away. Mudhole stomp. Double finger and slam. Greco Roman Nut Stomp. Austin teases tossing Vince out already. He starts to run Vince over the ropes, then stops. They stand there kind of awkwardly for a minute before Austin hits a clothesline and the first countdown of the night begins.

3. Golga- He doesn't want to get in and get in the middle of the Austin/McMahon stuff. Austin gives Vince a Thesz press. Now Golga gets in and jumps Austin from behind. Austin reverses and quickly eliminates Golga. Vince slides out of the ring and into the crowd. Austin follows and they brawl their way up the arena.

4. Droz- No one on TV even sees who comes in because the cameras are focused on Austin and Vince fighting in the arena into a bathroom. The Corporation is there and jumps Austin! Back to the ring and Droz is just hanging out. The entire period.

5. Edge- He charges in to get things going again. Unfortunately all he has to work with is Droz. Commentary only cares about Austin anyway.

6. Gillberg- Gillberg is here! It's only been a few weeks since Duane Gill became Gillberg. He gets the full entrance with tiny sparklers held by the crew, barely working pyro, getting sprayed down by a fire extinguisher, and the hilarious piped in chants that WCW in no way whatsoever did for Goldberg don't you even suggest that. Gillberg's entrance is still one of the greatest ever. He gets in the ring, does his version of Golberg's pose, and Edge dumps him out! Perfect. We go back to the bathroom to see Austin laid out and the Corporation making haste out.

7. Steve Blackman- He jumps on Droz but never mind that shit, a stretcher is coming out for Austin. Droz gets Blackman dangling over the ropes and screams at Edge to help. Edge comes over and eye pokes Droz! That got a good laugh out of me.

8. Dan Severn- Charges right in and tackles Blackman. But again never mind that shit, Austin's getting wheeled out. The camera stays with him the whole trip out the doors outside, toward the ambulance, right past the altar, heading down the ramp and out the door.

9. Tiger Ali Singh- Ugh. It's almost a relief they cut immediately back to Austin getting loaded up and the ambulance driving off. Every single second of the ambulance driving off like it's a James Nguyen movie.

10. The Blue Meanie- Meanie and Singh quickly get into it. SMELL THE WORKRATE! It certainly smells like something.

11. No one comes out for a long while, then we cut backstage to see Mabel taking Mosh out. I guess it was Mosh and now it's Mabel. Mabel gets in, takes some very weak swings, then uses Big Man Logic to quickly eliminate Severn, Blackman and Singh. Meanie tries to get some shots on Mabel with zero effect.

12. WWF Hardcore Champion Road Dogg- Mabel eliminates Meanie and Droz. Dogg backdrops Edge over. One foot hits but Edge manages to save himself. Dogg pushes him off the apron, into the announce table and Edge is gone. It's just Dogg and Mabel in the ring. After a few seconds the lights go out. Undertaker's music hits. When the lights come back on the Acolytes are in the ring attacking Mabel. They get Mabel out of the ring. I don't think he went over the top. Lawler weakly covers by saying "I think they got him over the top rope". The Acolytes push Mabel up the aisle to a waiting Undertaker and Bearer. Taker takes his hood off and his eyes are rolled back. He's supposed to be doing some kind of entrancement on Mabel but Mabel has no clue how to sell it. The Acolytes attack him again and everyone leaves through the entrance stage. That leaves Dogg all alone in the ring.

13. Gangrel- He comes in with a bit of spunk at least, in contrast to a lot of guys so far. So of course Dogg eliminates him almost immediately, once again leaving only one man in the ring for a long stretch of time.

14. Kurrgan- Oh for frak's sake. He could at least have come out at a point there was a lot of guys in the ring so he could blend in with the crowd. Kurrgan again uses Big Man Logic to beat Dogg down and hit his one move, the side suplex.

15. Al Snow- Minus Head. Dogg and Snow double up on Kurrgan, until Dogg takes an opening and dumps Snow.

16. Goldust- We're past halfway and, honest question, has there been a single entrant so far after Austin that's seemed even close to a plausible winner? Goldust hits Kurrgan with a DDT and Kurrgan gives about the worst DDT sell I've ever seen.

17. The Godfather- With a mini Ho Train of two. Godfather hits the train on Goldust.

18. Kane- Now this is a bit of a business pick up. Kane tosses Dogg. Kurrgan's out thank God. Godfather's gone. He chokeslams Goldust out. Big pop for Kane for the elimination run. But after that a whole bunch of white coats storm the ring. Long Russo story short, Vince and the Corporation have decided Kane is certifiably nuts and are trying to get him committed. Kane fights a few of the guys off, then steps over the top rope and out of the ring, eliminating himself and leaving no one in ring. Bloody hell. The white coat guys chase Kane off as I'm starting to wonder if this Rumble is getting me to a point where it's driving me so insane I should be committed.

19. WWF Intercontinental and Tag Team Champion Ken Shamrock- Vince also makes his way back out with a shirt on. Remember, he's still officially in the match. But you don't think he's going to get in the ring do you? Silly person. He goes over and joins commentary. Shamrock spends the whole period standing in the ring by himself because what this Rumble desperately needed was more dead time.

20. "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn- Gunn comes out with only one boot on and limping from his earlier match with Shamrock. Shamrock immediately attacks the bad ankle again. Gunn ducks a kick and hits a back suplex. He presses Shamrock up but can't hold him and drops him in the corner. Shamrock gets tossed onto the apron but not out.

21. Test- Making his PPV debut. He came into WWF the previous fall and almost immediately became a member of the Corporation as hired muscle. Once again we cut from the ring, this time to Taker and the Acolytes loading Mabel into a hearse. The next time we see him he'll be Viscera. But here comes an ambulance! Austin is driving! Austin's back! Not that anyone was actually shocked.

22. WWF Tag Team Champion The Big Boss Man- We never see his entrance as the camera is on Austin walking back to the ring. He chases Vince off commentary and through the ring but gets jumped by all the Corporation guys still in the match. Austin eliminates Shamrock. Vince gets back to commentary.

23. Triple H- He goes for Test. Gunn is somehow still in despite his bum ankle. Guys seem to be fighting over who's going to get the bounty to eliminate Austin so that part of Vince's plan seems to be working.

24. Val Venus- Vince says in passing he's going to pay the bounty money out of Shane's trust fund which gets a chuckle from me. Austin eliminates Gunn.

25. WWF European Champion X-Pac- Venus makes an apron save and pulls off a rare off the top rope move in the Rumble. A minute later Austin does the same thing.

26. "Sexual Chocolate" Mark Henry- Yup, we're full on into the Sexual Chocolate phase now. I wish I could say something interesting is happening in the ring but....it's not.

27. Jeff Jarrett- The crowd boos Debra leaving. Man, people have weird tastes. Austin gets stomped down in the corner. Pac heel kicks Trips to show it is every man for himself.

28. D'Lo Brown- Austin eliminates Test. Boss Man eliminates Pac. Jarrett and Boss Man get Austin up but not out.

29. Owen Hart- HHH eliminates Jarrett. Austin rolls out, grabs a pitcher of water, takes a swig, and throws the rest in Vince's face. Pissed Vince almost takes the headset off and gets in but cools himself down.

30. Chyna- Chyna won the famous Corporate Rumble on Raw to both earn a spot in the Rumble proper and to come in at #30, making her the first woman ever in the Rumble. She immediately attacks Henry, who had been borderline sexually harassing her for months. Chyna eliminates Henry! Austin comes up and clotheslines Chyna out! What a sexist. The patriarchy rules again. HHH and Austin find each other and make me wish this was a better Rumble. HHH eliminates Venus. Stunner on HHH! Trips is gone. This is such a screwy Rumble I'm not doing my usual final four reset. The unofficial final four, those still in the ring, are Austin, Boss Man, Brown and Owen. Vince is still in the match. They pair up for a while, Brown on Austin and Boss Man on Owen, and pretty much kill time and nothing else. After finally mixing the pairings up Austin eliminates Owen. Boss Man sets Austin up and Brown hits him with a frog splash. Then Boss Man flips the script and eliminates Brown. Stunner on Boss Man! Austin dumps him! With some difficulty on Boss Man's end. Fortunately no one tries to pretend it's over, everyone knows Vince is still officially in it. Austin gets out and after some jawing they brawl over the commentary table, then go into the crowd again. Austin gets a chair and whacks Vince in the head with it. Vince is out. Austin drags him back in the ring. Austin stares him down, in no rush to end this. Vince hits a low blow! Austin recovers and hits the Stunner! Again Austin wants to dish out more punishment and hits an elbow off the second rope. The Rock is out. He and Austin stare down and jaw at each other. Rock hops on the apron and he and Austin slug it out. Vince comes up from behind and eliminates Austin! VINCE MCMAHON wins the Royal Rumble. Austin's been screwed again. Rock and Austin fight to the back. Shane and the Stooges come out to celebrate with Vince. No Chance in Hell plays for Vince's win, pretty much cementing it as his theme. They stick it to Austin one more time by breaking the beer out and end show.

If you ever wondered what it would be like to have Russo fully in charge of a Rumble, that was it. That was Russorific to the core. The result? Probably the worst Rumble of all time. Fortunately he wouldn't get the chance to do another. *1/2

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- 1999 does not start with a bang for WWF on the PPV side. Fortunately for them they were still cranking out red hot TV every week on Raw so it wouldn't hurt too much. This is the year that the wheels would start to come off Russo's wild booking style a bit, leading to some big changes in the fall for both WWF and WCW. Rock/Mankind is mostly the only thing worth watching and very important in the career history of both men, but the Rumble is worth a look too as a crazy historical curio. Just don't expect to be impressed.

OVERALL SHOW GRADE: D

 

Bonus Match

 

Halftime Heat (taped 1/26/99, aired 1/31/99 during halftime of Super Bowl XXXIII)

Empty Arena Falls Count Anywhere Match for the WWF Championship: Mankind def The Rock (c) in 17:19- Super Bowl halftime counterprogramming was all the rage in these days, so WWF jumped on board in the middle of one of their hottest periods. They picked a good year for it too, all but the most hardcore football fans were probably looking for something else to watch as the lucky to be there Falcons were clearly overmatched by the late career Elway/TD Broncos. This was taped the afternoon before a Raw taping, even at this point Raw was still not live every single week. Kevin Kelley and Shane are on the call to start. We start out with full Fink intros in the empty arena. Sadly this is a bit of a preview for what we'd see most of 2020 and into '21, minus the fans on video screens or fake crowd noise. You can also call this another precursor to one of the staples of the COVID era, the cinematic match. Mankind's head is bandaged up after getting busted open the week before in the Rumble match. Vince comes out with Rock and takes over on commentary solo. He immediately bitches about this match being booked in the first place but quickly settles into mostly normal Vince play by play. They start out with some basics in the ring, with Mankind quickly hitting the double underhook DDT for 2. Socko is out and the Claw is on! Rock falls out of the ring. Mankind hits a baseball slide. Swinging neckbreaker on the floor for 2. Rock gets run into the timekeeper's table and commentary. Vince is not happy about that. Whip reversal and Mankind goes THROUGH the barricade! Things that are easy to do when there's no crowd. Rock hits some stomps and covers for 2. Mankind gets tossed into the empty chairs! This is turning into a New Japan match with all the chairs flying. I'm thinking of that recent (for me) Jon Moxley/Great O'Khan match at Power Struggle. There wasn't a chair left standing the entire floor section when that match was over. After a few chair tosses Rock comes over and borrows (not takes) Vince's headset to add a few words in. But here comes Mankind with Socko! The Claw is on again! Rock low blows to get out. Rock staggers up the stairs and Mankind hits him with a clothesline from behind, then runs Rock into the steps. More staggered climbing as they head to the top of the arena. Rock lays in wait at the top of the stairs and nails Mankind with a trash can. Rock kicks and Mankind rolls down the stairs! Rock dumps both verbal and literal trash on Mankind. We cut back to Kelley and Shane for some replays/edit covering. Back to Vince and "live" action as cameras find the wrestlers in a kitchen. Mankind gets thrown through a rack of cotton candy and run into a fridge. Rock takes Socko! HE PUTS SOCKO IN AN OVEN! THE HUMANITY! Mankind also gets burned on an open oven with Rock getting "Can you smell what the Rock is cooking" in. Mankind continues to get knocked around the kitchen. Rock throws BREAD on him! That's hardcore. Cover for 2. Rock gets a funny improv line in when Mankind knocks a bunch of dishes over, "Will you stop making a mess!". Rock finds some JD, sings a bit, takes a swig....and a punch from Mankind! More dishes fall. Hope they're being paid good for replacements. Mankind hits Rock with a giant bag of popcorn! There's popcorn everywhere! They go out the door into the catering area, with a bunch of crew there eating. Rock gets up, takes and eats a bit of popcorn, shouts "Too much salt!' and nails Mankind. And now everything on the catering table is getting dumped over. It's turning into a classic Vince McMahon food fight. Mankind gets something in his eye that he says burns. Rock says "It's mild, you..." and Mankind punches him. Rock backdrops out of a piledriver attempt and Mankind goes back over the catering table. There's one plate of food still standing you didn't get. And down goes the sculpture. Rock picks up some food out of a basket "The Rock doesn't even know what this is!". Mankind low blows Rock and covers for 2. Mankind takes an ice bowl in the face. And out the door into the office area. The brawl goes into a very posh office. The phone rings. Rock picks it up! "Smackdown hotel. Mankind's not available, he's busy with the Rock's FOOT IN HIS MOUTH". Rock chokes Mankind with the phone cord, then breaks about 17 HR rules talking to the female office worker. Mankind comes from behind to knock Rock around the hallway. And now we're out to the loading dock. Back and forth brawling and both guys are down. Mankind gets the Claw on again. He pushes Rock under a forklift. Mankind has an idea. He gets Rock in position, then politely asks the guy working the forklift to move. Vince is furious that Mankind asked nicely and said "please", which is hilarious to me. Mankind takes the controls and lowers the forklift pallet on top of Rock! The editing and shot choices are pretty bad here, it's a dead giveaway that's is not live and extremely staged, mostly the top down shots with Rock looking right into camera. Mankind gets on the pallet squashing Rock, and Hebner counts 3! Mankind wins the title back! That was fun. No masterpiece by any means, but a good little experiment that both guys worked very well and were clearly enjoying playing with. ***

There'd be one last title hotshot between these two, with Rock winning the title back again on Raw a couple of weeks after in a Ladder Match. He'd then hang onto it for his coming Wrestlemania showdown with Austin. As for Halftime Heat, it would be done again the next year but with very different content, then stopped. The only other "proper" Halftime Heat was in 2019, with a very good NXT 6 man tag match. It's an idea that needs to be brought back again.

Finally, in honor of Mankind's use of a forklift, a fun little bit to go out with: