Clash of the Champions XXXIV

Legacy Review

Clash of the Champions XXXIV

January 21, 1997 from the MECCA in Milwaukee, WI

Commentary: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan and Dusty Rhodes

We're entering the final year of the Clashes, this would be the next to last installment of the long running show. We're just days away from the first ever NWO-branded PPV, Souled Out. And we're also just days away from Super Bowl XXXI, which will feature the hometown (close enough) Green Bay Packers appearing in their first Super Bowl since the Vince Lombardi/Bart Starr days. Because of that the crowd is full of slightly amped up Packers fans that might have already dipped into a fair bit of Milwaukee's Finest before the show started.

The first match mentioned in the opening video is a classic case of "card subject to change". That's a LOT of pyro just for a Clash. I wonder if those Cheeseheads are flame retardant?

WCW Cruiserweight Championship: Dean Malenko def Ultimo Dragon (c) (w/Sonny Onoo) in 15:07- Dragon defeated Malenko at Starrcade to add the WCW Cruiserweight belt to the J-Crown, then lost the J-Crown to Jushin Liger at Wrestling World '97 (the name of the January 4th Tokyo Dome show then), but for some reason the WCW belt wasn't considered part of the J-Crown for that match and Dragon held onto it. Probably an agreement with WCW so they didn't lose control of it. Mike Tenay is in for this one. The crowd is firmly behind Malenko, with blue collar Wisconsin wanting nothing to do with Dragon or Onoo. The fancy pirouette ref Mark Curtis does when showing the belt to the crowd is something else. Basic, crisp back and forth to start and we quickly go to commercial. During that there's an ad for the brand new NWO hotline. Everyone's getting a damn hotline. "Kids, get your parents' permission, OR ELSE". So much for being rebels. We're back with a stalemate and reset in the ring. Tony and Tenay talk a bit about Dragon's J-Crown loss but dance around why the WCW belt wasn't included with it. The match breaks down into a brawl for a minute. Malenko hits a suplex and wraps up a headscissors. Dragon escapes, plants a stiff kick on Malenko's back and follows up with a flurry of kicks. Malenko powders and stretches his back out. As soon as he steps back in Dragon is all over him. Malenko fires back and hits a back suplex. He hooks on a legbar and does some knee work. Dragon rope breaks out of a half crab. Malenko hits a kneebreaker and puts on a good old stump puller! Hold #417. Always like to see someone break out the stump puller. They trade shots with Malenko getting the edge with back elbows. He dumps Dragon to the floor and kicks his leg against the guardrail. Back in Malenko hooks in a figure four! Dragon tries to lift Malenko's leg to power out but can't. After a bit Malenko lets go to dish out more punishment. Huge corner clothesline. Dragon responds with a spinning heel kick. One nitpick, all the knee work is totally forgotten about. Malenko hits a superplex and gets a flash cradle for 2. Standing switches, Malenko goes for a powerbomb, but Dragon rolls him over into a cradle for 2. A Dragon springboard dropkick sends Malenko to the floor. Malenko sidesteps a plancha. Dragon reverses a whip on the floor and Malenko goes into the guardrail. Asai moonsault! Back in Dragon hits a brain buster. The moonsault hits! Malenko kicks out! Dragon sets Malenko up top. Hurricanrana! But he can't cover. Malenko blocks the tiger suplex, which is what Dragon beat him with at Starrcade. He goes for the cloverleaf but Dragon small packages him for 2. Dragon flips out of another powerbomb attempt. Malenko congratulates him on his agility by running him through with a clothesline. Double underhook powerbomb. Malenko starts to hook the cloverleaf on but Onoo gets on the apron. Malenko punches him right back off. The cloverleaf is on! Dragon taps and Malenko wins the title back! Another fantastic match between these two. The cruiserweight division is dominating the rest of the company in terms of consistent match quality. No wonder Hogan doesn't want them anywhere near him. ****1/4

 

Scotty Riggs def Mike Enos in 2:26- Riggs' American Males tag partner Marcus Alexander Bagwell recently turned heel on him, joined the NWO and said from now on he wants to be known as Buff Bagwell. A meathead name for wrestling's ultimate meathead. They have a grudge match scheduled at Souled Out. Enos is formerly of the semi-famous tag teams the Wrecking Crew in AWA and the Beverly Brothers in WWF. He's little more than a jobber now. As we come in from commercials both guys are already in the ring and taking turns to argue with the ref for some reason. Enos jumps Riggs from behind but Riggs quickly turns the tables and whips Enos over the top to the floor. Plancha! Riggs gets whipped into the apron, then Enos steps on him to get back in the ring. Clothesline off the apron from Enos. Riggs backdrops Enos on the floor. Back in Enos hits a belly to belly suplex. Riggs nails a flying forearm, and that gets the pin. Can't fault the effort. *3/4

Another paid promotion from the NWO during commercials, this time for the Souled Out t-shirt. DiBiase's money must be running out. After that Mean Gene brings out the Four Horsemen. Well, three, Flair's still out with an injury. Okerlund mentions they recently had a "summit meeting" to work their differences out. The crowd wants nothing to do with Benoit's (pretty bad) promo, instead chanting "We want Flair", then "Bears suck" at Mongo. Guess that last year he spent with the Packers didn't get him any points. After Arn says a few words Mongo gets the mic and gets booed out. Which naturally doesn't stop him. Then Okerlund offers Debra the mic, and in typical Debra fashion she says she has nothing to say, then proceeds to prattle on for another two minutes about absolutely nothing.

 

Chris Jericho, Chavo Guerrero Jr and Super Calo def Konnan, La Parka and Mr. JL in 5:27- Card subject to change. There's been two last second substitutions to this match: Parka is replacing an injured Psychosis, while Jericho is stepping in for Juventud Guerrera after Juvy no-showed. This is classic lucha trios rules, so tagging and selling are optional. Tenay is back in for this one. Chavo and JL start with a forearm exchange. Speed run and JL hits a diving back elbow. Chavo responds with a flying forearm and dropkicks. Both sides tag and Konnan and Calo do some lucha flippy stuff around the ring. Calo gets a hurricanrana and shotgun dropkicks Konnan back into his corner. More tags. Parka and Jericho run into each other full speed with no one moving. Big clothesline from Jericho. Parka gets a back kick. Jericho hits a dropkick off the second rope, sending Parka to the floor and kicking the match over from regular tag to lucha in and out craziness. Chavo gets worked over and double teamed by Konnan and Parka. Konnan lifts Chavo up and Parka hits a doomsday corkscrew cannonball. Chavo double crossbodys Parka and JL, and tags out to Jericho. Jericho hits a plancha on Konnan. Everybody dive! Jericho saves Parka from landing on the floor head first. After everyone's gone Heenan says hold his headset, he's diving too! JL and Jericho get back in the ring. JL hits a hurricanrana for 2. Side suplex. Jericho sets up top, hits a hurricanrana off the top on JL, and gets the pin. Fine luncha trios stuff. Not strictly my cup of tea but it's fun enough. ***

 

Harlem Heat (w/Sister Sherri) def The Renegade and Joe Gomez in 3:44- I'm as shocked as you are the Renegade is even still on the roster. At least he's lost the sub-Ultimate Warrior look. Not a whole lot to say about this match, it's a jobber squash through and through. Heat break out what I think was a relatively new finisher for them, the Heat Seeker, to end it. 1/2*

 

Masahiro Chono def Alex Wright in 4:30- Chono's swung over for a quick US run to become an official member of the NWO, which will lead to him creating NWO Japan in New Japan. Wright gets nothing from the crowd on his entrance. Maybe one high pitched scream up in the nosebleed seats, that's it. At least he's not bothering with the dancing anymore. Nick Patrick is reffing this match and wearing an NWO shirt and hat, all pretense gone. Chono jumps Wright before the bell. He lays his NWO shirt over the top turnbuckle in his corner. Wright fights back and gives Chono buckle shots on the shirt to boos. Then he kicks the shirt away to more boos. Wright flippydos into an enzuguri. Kid, stop posing to try to get the crowd on your side. It's not happening. Chono runs Wright over with a shoulderblock, then tells him about it. Wright hits a spinning heel kick, covers, and Patrick slow counts for 2. Chono hits an inverted atomic drop. Wright wraps up a small package. Patrick counts even slower. The Nick Patrick as an evil ref stuff was serviceable when he was still pretending to be a regular, down the middle ref, but now it's just tedious. The crowd thinks so too, throwing loads of go away heat on Patrick. Chono tosses Wright over the top to the floor, which in theory is Patrick ignoring an obvious DQ if WCW didn't ignore that rule 90% of the time anyway. Wright hits a sunset flip off the top for 2. Patrick somehow is even slower. Wright kicks him in the shin, which accomplishes the near impossible, the crowd is almost on his side now. Almost. Chono dodges another dive off the top, hits the Yakuza kick, and it's over. Whatever. 3/4*

 

WCW United States Heavyweight Champion Eddie Guerrero def Scott Norton in 5:36- After just finishing up an angle where the Giant stole the US Title belt from Ric Flair and carried it around like it was his, which continued after Flair's injury, we are now in an angle where Syxx has stolen the US Title belt from Eddie and is walking around like it's his. How original. Eddie and Syxx have a ladder match scheduled for Souled Out. Norton has recently joined the NWO which means, joy of joys, we get Nick Patrick reffing this match as well. Eddie gives Patrick a friendly pat on the bum while he's checking Norton. Patrick threatens to DQ Eddie before he even rings the bell to start the match. Norton shows the obvious power advantage early, tossing Eddie around. He hits an avalanche and press slam. Eddie goes into dodge mode, hits a couple of low dropkicks to the knee, and goes to work on it. Chops from Eddie are no sold. A chop from Norton is very much sold. Norton shrugs off a pop up dropkick and hits a clothesline. He lifts Eddie up for a delayed suplex, holds him up with one arm, and just drops him. Powerslam. Powerbomb. Norton goes up to the second rope. Eddie dropkicks him, fights up, and hits a hurricanrana that Norton just about manages to sell. Norton dodges a swanton off the top and hits another big clothesline. Collision in the ring and Patrick goes down. DDP makes his way in through the crowd, wearing a Packers shirt the panderer. Diamond Cutter on Norton! To a huge pop too. This anti-NWO feud is in serious danger of making DDP super popular. Eddie goes up, hits the frog splash, and Patrick has no choice but to slow count three because Norton's taken two finishers and he's legally dead. Meh. *

 

Falls Count Anywhere: Chris Benoit (w/Woman) def Kevin Sullivan (w/Jimmy Hart) in 5:04- This endless feud continues, even after crossing over into real life for everyone involved. This is the second Falls Count Anywhere match these two have had on a major show. The first one at Great American Bash '96 was actually pretty good and helped lay some early groundwork for the match style. Most of the action in that match took place in a bathroom so you can be pretty sure that'll be referenced here. Sullivan calls Benoit out of the ring and they slug it out on the floor. Sullivan gets tossed over the rail, we go up the steps, and into, guess what....A BATHROOM! Called it. By the way, that familiar looking not Doug Dellinger guy that's doing some of the security work for this match? That's Bobby Eaton. A paper towel dispenser gets killed with Benoit's head. A thrown trash can takes Hart out. Sullivan's head kills the other towel dispenser. Better not put one of those hand dryers in to replace them. Those things suck, and are *way* more unhygienic. Poor ref Randy Anderson ends up on the floor with at least a foot in one of the floor urinals. Burn that shoe. Sullivan hits a short clothesline in the bathroom for 2. Benoit gets run into a wall radiator. They go out and work their way back into the crowd. Some guy in Sting facepaint does a hell of a job of framing his face perfectly on camera. Benoit gets rolled down the stairs. They get in the ring and Benoit gets hung in the tree of woe. Sullivan hits the running knee and double stomp. Benoit kicks out! Hart gets on the apron and Sullivan tries to get the megaphone. Anderson tries to stop it even though it's no DQ. While that's happening, Woman gets a wooden chair from under the ring, gets in, and whacks Sullivan! Benoit falls on Sullivan and gets the pin. I can't help but notice Benoit fell with his crotch right in Sullivan's face. I'd lay odds that was deliberate. As I said, this feud turned into real life bad blood between these two. After the bell Benoit gets another wooden chair and nails Sullivan with it for funsies. Pretty much a condensed version of their GAB match with a slightly different finish and no attempt to innovate any. Not that they had much time to. **

 

The Steiner Brothers def The Amazing French Canadians (w/Col. Robert Parker) in 6:55- I'm sure this a Steiners/Quebecers rematch from some point in their respective WWF runs. The Steiners have a tag title shot against the Outsiders coming up at Souled Out. During their entrance a video message to them from Hall and Nash plays hyping the match up. The Frenchies jaw. The Steiners jump. Rick hits a Steinerline and the faces clear the ring. The heels jump them as they're getting back in the ring and toss them out. The Steiners sneak from behind up the top rope and ambush them. Commercial. Back with the Canadians double teaming Rick. Rick dodges their finisher but Jacques knocks Scott off the apron. Double Steinerline from Rick and hot tag to Scott. Scott tosses both Canadians around. Jacques tries to get a shot with their flag but Scott cuts that off. Rick hoists Oulette up, Scott hits a super avalanche DDT, and we're done here. Paint by numbers Steiners squash, who are already nowhere near what they were at the start of the decade as time and injuries continue to pile up. *1/4

 

"The Total Package" Lex Luger def WCW World Tag Team Champion Scott Hall (w/Kevin Nash and Syxx) by DQ in 10:29- As mentioned earlier, Syxx has Eddie Guerrero's US Title belt. Not much of a pop for Luger as the crowd has been fairly pro-NWO all night. Hall does some mocking and gives Luger some extra zip on the toothpick flick. Lockup and Luger shows, to the shock of no one, that he's stronger. Hall back suplexes out of a headlock. Luger no sells it and flexes. Hall gets a boot up in the corner and hits a bulldog for 2. ARMBAR. Luger clotheslines out. They trade hiptoss block reversals. Hall turns it around to hit a chokeslam. Luger dodges the follow up elbow drop. Hall tights pulls Luger to the floor. Luger cuts Syxx off with a clothesline, but gets taken out by Nash. He barely beats the count back in. Hall beats him down in the corner. Nash distracts the ref so Syxx can hit Luger with a clothesline. Hall tries a feet on the ropes pin for 2. Nash gets another shot in. Hall fallaway slam for 2. Abdominal stretch with rope leverage help. And Syxx leverage help. Luger hiptosses out but misses an elbow drop. Hall plants Luger with a discus punch and mocks him with slaps. Luger reverses a corner whip, slides under, and crotches Hall on the post. He hits a sort of dropkick leaping over the top rope. That was different. An atomic drop sends Hall into the corner, then Luger hits not one, not two, but three inverted atomic drops. Someone's going to need an icepack after this match. Hall tries an eye poke for space but Luger hits him with a powerslam. He calls for the Torture Rack, which has been built up into a superfinisher of instant death in recent months. Nash and Syxx both try to get in and are taken out. The Rack is on! Nash is in again. Luger gives him the steel forearm of doom. But I guess the steel's rusted because Nash is right back up. Luger tries to fight both Outsiders off, then Syxx comes in with a shot to draw the DQ. OKish. **1/4

The fight continues after the bell. The Steiners run in and all six guys fight, stop, fight again, stop, fight again and end show.

OVERALL SHOW THOUGHTS- It started out great with the best match on a Clash in years, though it's just one of many great Malenko/Dragon matches, rebounded a bit with some harmless trios lucha fun, then collapsed back into the C-show level the Clash has become the last few years. All the important stuff happens on Nitro now. Thankfully there's only one Clash left and then we can put this old dog out of his misery.

OVERALL SHOW GRADE: D+